Progress

I have to re-remind myself sometimes about the nature of progress. I find myself unconsciously thinking that life happens in a straight line. I seem to think that I will realize or recognize some issue in my life, put in a place a single, clear plan to address it and then that will be that.

What I then have to realize is that life doesn't usually work that way. Maybe if we lived in Eden, and there was still a need for growth & refinement, the process would be smooth. But, we live in a fallen world, and the thorns in our flesh don't always fall away without issue. Sometimes they do, and that's wonderful when it happens. But I need to remember to give myself grace and have patience for the process of change.

As metals are refined, the skimming of the dross is a slow, step by step process. When wood is whittled away to reveal the art underneath, as envisioned by the Maker, and when our hearts and lives and reshaped and changed, it takes time, and it takes process. The rushing water of the ocean takes years to smooth the stones into the works of art that reflect the beauty of the world around them, so I use these examples to remind us all that sometimes the crags and rough edges are just markers of a spot in a longer process. Trust Him for the journey, and we will get there right in time.

Cold War

I had a meeting earlier this week that was a little tense to say the least. In fact, after most of the people had left the room, a friend who remained in the room looked at me and said, "Cold war. How long do you think that'll last?"

I sigh again just thinking about it.

I left that meeting feeling frustrated and a little disheartened. Then a new thought occurred to me: what can I do to thaw things out? Now, in general, I am definitely NOT in favor of inserting myself into situations that don't involve me, but this particular situation not only involves me, but officially (in a professional responsibility sense) is mine to help mediate.

So, I went back to my desk and sent off a quick note - thanking one of the people in the group for being frank, honest and up front. It's true that after her direct comments, there was an uncomfortable silence from some, but what she did was speak truthfully and without rancor.

I'm not sure my email will make much difference at all, but my hope was to do a tiny bit to ease the situation, and - more importantly - to actively and intentionally encourage honesty and direct communication. While that may all seem like a lot of uninteresting corporate musing, I am certain the principles are rooted in the Bible. And my take is that the Bible is as applicable at work as it is at home or in the church or anywhere else.

"Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth." Proverbs 16:3 (NIV)

"These are the things you are to do: Speak the truth to each other, and render true and sound judgment in your courts;" Zechariah 8:15 (NIV)

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16 (NIV)

I'm doing my best to take what I read in the Book of Truth and apply it to my life. It's not always going to be graceful, and it's sometimes might not even be done well or rightly, but I'm doing the best I can. And I think that's what we're called to do. So, one day at a time, let's do it!

You Are

Our pastors at church are great at reminding us that 1) God is who He says He is and that 2) He does what He says He'll do. There is a third truth I want to focus on today: 3) You are who He says You are.

Yep, let me say that again: You are who HE says you are.

We all tend to be so hard on ourselves, and the phrase "negative self-talk" has become rather common in our self-help saturated world. There is a key, fundamental truth in the midst of all the coaching for self-positivity. Believing God's word means believing ALL of it, and it's been my own experience that some of the most difficult words to trust in are those He has about me, and I've seen the same struggle in so many others. But let's review just some of what He says about you & I.

First of all, and this is a "go to" for me when I am tempted to believe otherwise: I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14; fact check me.

I am God's treasured possession (Deuteronomy 7:6).

You are God's child. (John 1:12-13)

You are the apply of His eye (Psalm 17 & Zechariah 2:8).

We are loved with an everlasting love. We are LOVED. By God. Drink that in, friends. The everlasting love of the Father is yours. He loves you. (Jeremiah 31)

And He has chosen you. (Isaiah 41)

You are precious in God's sight. PRECIOUS. (Isaiah 43)

You are God's friend. (John 15:15)

He delights in you. I'm not going to give you the reference on that one; I challenge you to find it for yourself, and to dig into the Bible, it's His love letter to us all, and there is MUCH that He says about you. His truth isn't reserved for Him and what He says about the world, Himself or others. He's talking about you. He's talking about me. Will you believe?

Thankful for the Lies

I found myself praying a strange prayer this morning. This last week has come with many attacks from the enemy; I've heard lies in my head, and have had to fight hard to remember that the truth lies in Christ, not in this fallen world and the words of the liar.

So, as I was reflecting on this and praying about it, I heard myself telling God that, as strange as it may seem, I was grateful - in a way - for the lies. Not only am I grateful for the ability to see the attacks for what they are, but also that I have the chance to fight against them. I've called on scripture, the power of the name of Jesus, and simply the love of God many times in the last week or so...and, of course, He never fails me.

More so, these challenges of deception have forced me to dig back into some basic truths as a reminder and as reinforcements. And in digging into these these, I've found myself rooted in God's strength. Furthermore, some of my feelings that have reared up in response to his teasing have really challenged me to look at the root causes. I've unearthed unknown and unsuspected pockets of pride, of fear and even rebellion...all in the last week! And as these impurities get brought up to the surface, I know the Refiner skims away the dross, and I am more able to shine my light for His glory. So, I found myself thinking about this scripture, and being thankful for this little span of trials.

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience." James 1:2-3 (NKJV)

And more than gratitude for the trials, I find myself grateful for a God who works all things together for the good, for my good...and for your good. My challenge to myself, especially in this coming week, is to look upon ALL of it as good...not because Satan's lies are good, and not because the discomfort feels good...but because GOD is good, and I have the option to put it all in His caring and capable hands. With that perspective, there is little to see on the landscape without also being grateful for His hand at work!

Circumstances being what they are...

I woke up today kinda out of sorts. I haven't had enough sleep the last few nights in a row, and that kind of pile up takes a toll on me. I had a headache, my eyes hurt and I was already running late for work by the time I woke up, so no time to workout. Not my personal favorite start to a day. So, I got up and started dragging myself through the morning routine.

Then, I was hit with a thought that I'm nearly certain came straight from God: it doesn't have to be this way.

No, I don't have the ability to magically catch up on sleep; nor can I shake this headache. However, God is good, and He is faithful, and when I zoom out just a tiny bit, I remember that He blesses me in incredible ways again and again and again. He's relentless in His love and in His favor. And I am so grateful.

So, I was reminded again that regardless of circumstance, I have the option of choosing to consider it all as joy and letting HIS truth be the truth of my day. Praise God! It'll change your life!

When You Are With Him

I wrote about Asa yesterday, but this guy has some good stories, so here's another.

Background for this passage is simply that Asa was kind of "freaked out" about some opposition he was up against. Luckily, Azariah was there...

"The Spirit of God came upon Azariah son of Oded. He went out to meet Asa and said to him, 'Listen to me, Asa and all Judah and Benjamin. The Lord is with you when you are with him. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will forsake you. For a long time Israel was without the true God, without a priest to teach and without the law. But in their distress they turned to the Lord, the God of Israel, and sought him, and he was found by them.'" 2 Chronicles 15:1-4 (NIV)

The short version of the aftermath is that, upon hearing this, Asa's heart was encouraged, his resolution to believe God restored and he took courage and charged ahead.

There is much we can learn not only from Asa's example, but from Azariah's exhortation. The idea that when we seek God, we will find Him is repeated in many places in the Bible, and I can always use the reminder. I also appreciate the reality check in reference to Israel. I'm comforted by the reminder that my problems aren't the first problems ever to exist on the face of the earth; it's a perspective thing I guess. I remember that, over generations, Israel repeatedly turned from God, but each and every time they sought Him, He was found by them, and He proved Himself strong on their behalf. It's hard for even me to convince myself He won't show up for me.

My favorite sentence in Azariah's encouragement is this: "The Lord is with you when you are with him." People talk about "finding God" all the time, and I've often heard it said in response that "God wasn't lost!" There's truth in the sentiment of that humor though. God doesn't stray from me; but I do stray from Him. He is always with me; it just doesn't seem like it sometimes, because I forget that I am with Him.

I just have to remember that our God is a loving, ever-present Father and that His heart is ALWAYS on me. And all it takes to feel that reality is to make an effort to be with Him. And He is with me. Always. Forever. This truth may seem cliche, and certainly may seem like old news to some, but when I stop and consider the magnitude of a loving Father whose perfect love shields me always, prefers me always and is always focused on me, I feel waves of gratitude anew. We serve an amazing King!

We are You

A tiny tidbit caught my attention the other night... Look at Asa's prayer below:

"Then Asa called to the Lord his God and said, 'Lord, there is no one like you to help the powerless against the mighty. Help us, O Lord our God, for we rely on you, and in your name we have come against this vast army. O Lord, you are our God; do not let man prevail against you.'" 2 Chronicles 14:11 (NIV)

It was the tiny pronoun in the last sentence that struck me. Asa calls on God and asks for his help in battle and in strength. And yet, his last request comes just a breath after declaring his devotion to the Lord. And after affirming His commitment to God, he asks, "let no man prevail against you."

When I first read this, I thought that, perhaps, the idea was "Hey, God, you are going to help us, so don't fail and make yourself look bad." BUT, I think there's more to it than that. I see it this way: Asa's commitment to the Lord is his declaration of unity with God and with His purposes. Is it not true that our metaphor for our own relationship to Christ is marriage? And does the Bible not make it perfectly clear that, in marriage, we are joined as one in unity? With those things in mind, I believe Asa is saying, "You are our God, and we are Yours. We hitch ourselves to you!" In other words, we are one with You.

His next request, then, is not only perfectly logical, but also lovely in its commitment to their unity with God: "Let no man prevail against you." I read this to say, "If we fail, You fail." This isn't said because Asa expects God to fail; quite the opposite. I think Asa is just emphasizing their commitment to the Lord - tying his heart, his army & his success to Him.

Of course, I cannot know Asa's true intent, and this is all conjecture...but I love the example. I am Him, and that helps me believe, just a little bit more, that He is for me, and will never let me fall!

Rewards

Let's start with the good stuff:

"O LORD, by your hand save me from such men, from men of this world whose reward is in this life. You still the hunger of those you cherish; their sons have plenty, and they store up wealth for their children. And I—in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness." Psalm 17:14-15 (NIV)

The phrase "such men" is referring to those elaborated more in the preceding verses, but basically it's "bad guys." The Psalmist is decrying their evil just words before this passage. Then, he throws in this beauty.

There are a couple things that catch my attention & admiration:

First, notice that the "such men", our evil-doers are also referred to as people "whose reward is in this life." It's almost thrown in as an after thought, and certainly is a passing descriptor, but let's think about the significance! If this word tells us that there are those whose reward is in this life, it's logical to say that the "other" group of people are those whose reward is in another life. Oh friends, don't you want to be those whose reward is not limited to the natural world?!?

Secondly, I loved the translation that reads "You still the hunger." That's beautiful to me, and such an apt metaphor. The Lord does fill my hungry places, but He stills them as well. Flutters of anxiety and fear are still when I let Him touch those places inside me. And, like the Psalmist I will strive to submit my hear to Him so that I can see His face in righteousness and find satisfaction in His likeness!

How grateful I am today for the scripture! They feed us again and again and then more!

Falling Down

I had a little fall recently...well, the fall was little, but the aftermath wasn't quite. I slipped on my stairs and ended up cutting myself on a baby gate I use for my dogs. The cut ended up being long and deep and right through an arterial vein. I will spare you all the gory details, but the bottom line is, it wasn't good. After a day and a half in the hospital (which can only be partially blamed for my absence from writing; I apologize for that!), I came home to recover.

The good news was that I wasn't home alone. My boyfriend was over hanging out, and it was a good thing! I lost a lot a blood and he was there to drive me to the ER, get me situated once there and also to just take care of me in a million ways over the next few days.

A couple days later, he came across this verse in his reading:

"If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble." Ecclesiastes 4:10 (NLT)

He actually thought this was quite funny, and sent it to me in a text message - claiming it was "my" verse for this season. I have to admit I also thought it was funny, but of course, we both agreed that there is more in this scripture than just an opportunity to tease me about falling. :)

Let's put it in context; this passage is verses 9-12. The NLT has "The Advantages of Companionship" as the heading for this paragraph:

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken."

Of course, I am certain I am not alone in having heard this passage before - many times. Yet, I am struck anew by its relevance and its message as I think about the happenings of my own fall. In this particular example, my stumble was literal, and I am struck with a new appreciation for my companion that night. He didn't leave my bedside - literally, and he reached out to help me when I needed it. I am struck as I write with a wave of gratitude for not only him, but also for the others in my life whose hand is always within reach when I find myself on the ground.

As Thanksgiving approaches, I'm not going to buck tradition, but instead embrace it. I'm giving thanks today for companions whose hands are outstretched, and who stand with me when I have a battle to fight. And with God's powerful love woven amidst our fellows in Christ, what is there for us to fear?

For Me

Remember this: The Lord is FOR YOU. (Psalm 56:9)

There is much cause for celebration even in just letting that truth simmer and settle into your heart.

"Give your burdens to the Lord,

and he will take care of you.

He will not permit the godly to slip and fall." Psalm 55:22 (NLT)

He loves us with a pure & true love. His love is active and ever-present. I had a VERY godly woman chide me the other day for saying, "I worry about...."

"Never worry," she said. "Worry is sin."

She's right of course; that's Bible. Worry is sin. Trust in Him. I am trusting in Him. I know that He is for me. He is taking care of me - right now. There is much cause for praise! He will NOT permit me to slip & fall. Thank You, Father!!!

Squirming

I was engaged in some heavy-duty conversation last night, and a dear friend of mine was lamenting the challenges of making relationships really work. We were discussing the hard work of being fully honest, vulnerability and speaking up at times and in ways that are frightening or intimidating. It has been my experience, in any case, that the most worthwhile relationships in my life have also taken some of the largest doses of courage and strength.

My friend made an off-handed, only half-serious comment, the basic gist of which was, "Well, maybe we're not meant to be in those relationships - you know, the ones where it's hard." My friend wasn't serious, but I did have to smile. "My theory," I said, "is that a certain degree of challenge in my fulfilling relationships is simply a sign that God loves me."

My friend looked at me strangely (you might be looking at your computer with much the same facial expression!).

"As I see it," I said, "the relationships that take the most from us - when they're relationships that are worthy of the energy - also happen to be those that grow and develop us the most."

I use the qualifier about relationships that are worthy of the energy, because I know I'm not the only one who's willfully delved into relationships that were not in God's will for me...relationships that shirked His instructions and (I thought) fulfilled my own plans and desires. That type of relationship has also been hard. But, for me, it's a different type of difficult. The pain and aggravation of one of these self-propelled relationships was often caused by the existence of the relationship itself, and were largely in response to ungodly behavior or circumstances by one party or the other (yes, sometimes that "ungodly" person was me!). In these relationships, I found my heard wrenching again and again.

By contrast, rather than feeling like I've been wrenched in some way, healthy relationships in which I choose to really "dig deep" and show up usually leave me feeling like I'm squirming a bit. There's discomfort, yes. And some truth and honesty is painful in its own way...but, even with all that being true, there is a release in all of it. And the journey bears its own price again and again. That type of honesty and intention leads to a greater understanding of God, a truer commitment to Christ's ideals and a greater ability, for me, to lay down my self and seek after Him.

So, I guess my summary here is that, at least in my experience, wrenching is not good. But squirming just shows I'm living into God's will. Many great Bible teachers have spoken at length about the need to push past our comfort zones. A great pastor at my church recently remarked that our comfort zones "aren't places we were meant to live; they're places we're meant to rest." And I know Beth Moore has said that, if you're not being stretched into some sort of discomfort in your relationships, you're living in a world that is too small. Jesus stretched. Ah, I could probably write days on that alone. Can you imagine? Do you think Jesus' days were comfortable in almost any way? Thanks to the grace of our Father, His resolve was able to remain firm. Yet, I suspect, He probably had days where even He wanted to squirm a bit too...

Truth Telling

I'm fairly certain that no one reading this post would disagree with me in saying that honesty is of the utmost importance to God. I wonder if I might lose a few of you if I modify my statement to say that "Absolute honesty is of the utmost importance to God."

I wonder how many of you might start considering the true definition of absolute honesty, as I have been lately.

The Bible tells us that the truth will set us free (John 8:32). It also encourages its reader, over and over again, to be truthful and to reject falsehoods (Ephesians 4:25, Proverbs 30:8, etc). Furthermore, there is Biblical example after example of the Godly pursuit of speaking truth. In many instances, truth is also closely connected with love...it might not be too far a stretch to say that love cannot exist without truth, nor truth without some form of love.

Along these same lines, there is this phrase we use that has been bothering me lately "Spare me the details" or "I spared him/her the full story." To "spare" someone seems to imply that the speaker is doing that person a favor; yet, the context of these statements often is within the cloak of opting out of a full truth. How much love can there be when half truths are spoken? Or partial truths omitted? Or raw truth avoided? What is left with absolute truth is shied away from?

I have been thinking a lot about this topic lately, and I suspect some of you are nodding along as you read. I don't think it would be hard to find people willing to join in my rally cry for "Truth!" Yet, I see the hypocrisy when I look at my own life. How many times have I avoided answering a question, because I didn't want to give my full, most truthful answer? How many times have I hoped to dodge a particular topic, because of hesitation about sharing the truthful account of my experience with a certain person or topic?

And yet, at the same time, would I not tell any child that a partial truth is not the truth at all?

I'm still considering this topic, and I invite you to do the same. I wonder what my life would look like, and in what areas there would be change, if I committed absolutely to rigorous honesty without exception. It's important to speak the truth with love, yes...but to continue to speak the truth nonetheless. Agree?

Permissive

Our pastor recently challenged us all to begin earnestly praying Psalm 139:23&24:

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,

and lead me along the path of everlasting life." (NLT)

As he pointed out, verse 24 is really where the rubber meets the road. "Point out anything in me that offends you..."

Well, I have been praying this prayer, and I have to say I was not anticipating the things that God has been pointing out to me. So far, He's shown me a couple key areas in which I need to do some work. However, both of these areas elicited, from me, a surprising response. When the Lord said, "Hey, look at this," my heart's instant reaction was "Yeah, I know." Yikes!

I had expected (hoped?) that He would reveal things to me that were surprising areas - new frontiers just opening up before me. Instead, I realized, He was pointing out areas that offended Him, and they happened to also be areas where I knew I had some work to do.

God didn't say, "Hey, look at the ways in which you judge others" only for me to respond with, "What? I didn't know I did judge anyone!" Instead, my honest, unfiltered response was "Yeah, I know...I do that a lot, don't I?"

So, what I'm realizing is that - in addition to God pointing out these specific areas, He's also calling into question a bigger offense: my own permissiveness with my sin.

I've said, "Well, yeah, I do judge people sometimes, but pretty much only strangers. It's not like they're my friends or family." YIKES.

I'm just being honest here...but the truth is, I do have areas in which I sort of "let things slide." It's not like I pause and make a reasoned, rational decision. I don't think, "Well, I am pretty sure a little sin is no big deal." If I thought it through that much, I'd respond to my own conviction. Instead, these are areas - some of which may seem "minor" - that I sort of see slide past the radar as they happen. I just don't let them sit on the radar long enough to set off any warning bells.

So, as I continue to pray Psalm 139:23 & 24, I encourage you to do the same. I also encourage you to scour your life for areas in which you may have your own permissiveness showing up. Perhaps you will not find any, and I pray that is the case! But, for me, there are a few things that I know it's time to work on. So, here I go!

Representation

I've been thinking a lot lately about the idea of representation. Many have surely heard it said that part of our job, here on earth, is to represent God to those around us. Hopefully you've all heard the saying that "You may be the only Bible someone ever reads" or "You may be the only Jesus someone gets to meet." The idea behind these phrases, of course, is that YOU carry the message of Christ, in all you do, in all you say.

The Bible tells us that we are surrounded by a "great cloud of witnesses" (see Heb 12:1). These witnesses are perhaps meant to be the angelic host, perhaps there is more to it. I am not certain. What I am sure about, though, is that the people in our lives see us. There are children in our world, coworkers in our days, neighbors on our streets and family at our holidays. And when they see you - even out of the corner of their eyes - they are taking in parts of the story of who you are.

It took me a couple years to be ready to put a Christian symbol on my car after committing my life to Jesus. I wanted to make sure I could be a consistently gracious driver before I went around advertising myself as a believer. And if that thought strikes you as unpleasant - that a "Jesus fish" or bumper sticker or other identifier is equivalent to "advertising yourself as a believer," then please remember that people do notice. And whatever your motivation may be for your cross necklace, Christian bumper sticker or sloganed T-shirt, it's the non-believer that you encounter who is your primary audience. It is to him or her that you are representing Jesus. Think...every day you climb into your car, little Jesus fish on the back, you take on the mantle of emissary for the Lord. And each time you talk about going to church, all in hearing distance become the mission field...

My heart's desire is to be someone that others see and think, "She's different. I wonder what it is." But, God, I ask you would NEVER let it be that others would see me and, on any level, think "Gosh, I thought she was a Christian."

None of us are perfect, and I am not the only one who will fall short of the ideal from time to time. But, when I remember that the word "represent" really is re-presenting Jesus to those around me, I remember the weight of the responsibility of being His. There is a whole cloud of witnesses who see me with spiritual eyes; yet the audience here in my daily life is no less important.