Gotcha?

(Note: Due to multiple computer issues with multiple computers (yes, really) and a busy schedule, I apologize for the last few days sans blog posts! Thanks for the privilege of sharing my thoughts on the days when my schedule & technology work together!)

So, in passing, someone spoke some words of wisdom to me that keep coming up in my heart and mind. They’ve lingered, and for me, when things “linger,” they usually have more to offer.

Here’s what he said, “God is not a ‘gotcha!’ God.”

Now, in fairness, this may mean a lot of different things, and I won’t purport to know exactly what even the speaker meant when he said it. I will, however, share about what it’s coming to mean to me.

Like many of us, I came out of childhood, adolescence and even my early adulthood with some strange notions about God and what He’s all about. My heart is certainly moved for those of us that grew into a distorted notion of God, regardless of the reason. For myself, my re-education started at the ground levels, and I was barely aware of the fact that I even needed a re-education. I think the enemy convinces many that their incorrect beliefs are correct.

I had to start with a willingness to even begin to understand God anew. His word says that when we draw near to Him, He draws near to us. I will say I began without even a notion of what it meant to “draw near” to God, but someone told me that all I had to do was be willing to be willing to get to know Him. So, I started there.

I got to know God better… I started to see His handiwork in my life in ways and places I hadn’t before. And I mean that not only was I seeing His work as His (though perhaps, before I’d attributed it elsewhere), but additionally, He was working in new ways. And His work, which I still find to be true, was quite persuasive.

For me, it took me about 3 years to even get to the place where I was willing to start seeking God in even more “formal” ways. I use the word “willing” here with intention. I almost said it took me a few years to be “ready,” but what I’ve learned is that I’m not a great judge of when I am and am not “ready” for certain things to occur. So far, however, I have a decent pulse on when I’m willing.

I started by going back to church. I’d had countless “bad” experiences with church and various and sundry church people. I wish this was not the case, but for me, it was. I’d been hurt, offended and further alienated more times than I care to recall. A lot of it was me; I see that now. But not all of it.

God is good, though. He provided, at the point in my life, a couple key voices who gave me good direction on my path. He also provided a couple great churches. I would have sworn to you at the time that churches “like that” didn’t exist prior to my discovery of the first one, but I suspect now that I just hadn’t stumbled upon one yet. God’s timing is providential indeed.

So, I started going to church again, and my heart was open in new ways. I heard solid Biblical teaching, and started to be open to more and more. I knew then that something was changing, and that God must have had a hand in it. I was starting to consider ideas that I’d previously dismissed as invalid. This was actually happening quite a lot.

I started reading my Bible more… and then even doing more formal Bible studies… things were changing. Eventually, I recommitted my heart and life to Jesus, a first for me as an adult. Change had come in a big way, and has continued to come in the years since.

Today, God is the #1 in my life. I had long desired to feel the way about God that I do today. I’m not sure how or what happened in the interim, but I know I kept searching, and I believe He was right there with me, all along, taking me through the places I needed to go in order to end up where I am. He had a plan, and a path marked out for me. His timing was just not quite what I’d have expected.

So, how does this all relate to the idea of a God who doesn’t play “gotcha!”?

Well, what I’m realizing for myself is that I worry sometimes that His plan is for some sort of greater good that, for me, means a life of disappointment and denial. I realize, though, that this isn’t in synch with who God is. Yes, sometimes life is hurtful and painful. And His greatest concern is not always our comfort. However, His sovereign hand does work for the GOOD. And my job is to trust that good as God sees it isn’t that far off from good as I might request it.

Beth Moore says that she believes God answers every prayer, and that His answers are 1) yes, 2) not yet and 3) I have something better in mind. I believe this to be true as well.

He is for me. He loves me. Whatever confused ideas I may have about love, I can rest firm that God’s definition of love is pure. It doesn’t involved trickery, self-promotion or a last-minute switcheroo. His love is patient. His love is kind. At least in my own personal vernacular, the idea of a kind love is not compatible with a “gotcha” at the end of the story. He’s not out there to psych me out. Love is not rude. It always protects. It never fails. I’m glad for a God that never fails, even while I am still learning to understand His ways.