Consecrated: to be filled up

Blindness & Our Need for Eyes to See

2011-10-14T07:20:00.000-05:00

Hello friends & beloved children of the King!!!

My amazing church does a monthly event called Night of Worship (NOW). It's pretty much exactly what it sounds like it might be: a night where all we do is worship! It's always a powerful evening and I wholeheartedly believe it is a powerful tool is our corporate arsenal.

Recently, before NOW, our Worship Pastor asked the team what we were praying about for that night and for the weekend services ahead... God showed up as I started asking Him where He wanted me praying, and below is a revised version of what I sent back. There is a powerful message here about spiritual blindness, the schemes of the enemy and God's desire for our victory. I hope it blesses you. Enjoy!

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As I started seeking, the story of Elisha & his servant from 2 Kings 6 came to mind right away... the one where Elisha's servant freaks out because they're surrounded, and Elisha tells him not to fear b/c there are more with them than against them. The part that jumped to mind specifically was where Elisha prays that the servant's eyes would be opened, so he would be able to really see the entire reality. The idea of opening eyes - opening the eyes of the people of the church, the people of OUR church so that they are equipped and empowered to SEE what's going on around each and all of us in the spiritual realm is what God wants me praying. Some people, I felt, needed to see that they were under attack. Some people need to know that they're being pursued by the enemy's forces so that they can respond as warriors, empowered in the truth of victory. Some people need to see that, in the midst of the battleground they see, they are surrounded by mighty, powerful, warring angels of God. It's not just that God is with us in this vague, pat-on-the-back kind of way. Some need a new vision of His ARMY with them. Yep, this is what He put on my heart...

Reading this story in its context, I was amazed to see how rich this idea of spiritual sight & blindness is in this passage! God had more to talk to me about! After Elisha prays for his servant to receive spiritual sight, he also prays for his physical enemies to be blinded. He then tells them a simple lie: you're not where you think you are, and the person in front of you isn't who you think he is. They, of course, in their blindness, just go along with him as he says he'll take them down the right path. The language, actually, is that he LEADS them. He leads them to the place HE wants them to go... their original plans and preparation are completely invalidated. Their hopes & mission are completely cut off at the knees. They're taken off course, and more than that, they are brought into a place of captivity.

(There's a whole separate message in what happens after that, but one thing at a time!)

I think the Lord's message for us includes BOTH of these pieces of the passage. When the man of God can't SEE reality (because you know the warring angels are definitely part of the REAL picture), he fears. And when those engaged in the battle can't see, when they are rendered blind, they are led astray; they're led away from the goal at which they had actually already arrived, and they allow themselves to be led into a place of captivity, bondage & powerlessness.

We need sight. Not just "insight," but vision for the people of God's church, vision for ourselves, and actually, as this is entirely germane to some things in my own life right now, I'm praying hard for vision for some of those closest to me! We need to see the world with open eyes, whole vision and through eyes of faith. We must believe in ALL the reality around us: God's power, His purposes, the warring angels with which He surrounds us, and the already-finished defeat of ALL that comes against us as His people.

I was and still am praying for vision and standing firm against the areas of blindness by which we are needlessly bound. I'm praying for revelation of the kingdom - present & future - the way GOD sees it. I'm praying for Holy Spirit goggles. Through truth comes empowerment, excitement, freedom and joy. I'm praying for that. As conquerors standing under the blood of Jesus, we have every right and reason to pray and trust in absolute victory and freedom.

What does God want you praying for today? Where do you need a fresh revelation and eyes to see? Ask Him. He is with you! And He is faithful! I'm thanking Him today for your victory!

2011-09-09T10:21:00.001-05:00

Learning to say, in every thing, "I thank You, Lord" has been one of the biggest and - I'm certain - most significant battles of my life. I have, in many seasons, cried out to God saying, "Thank You, Lord! Thank You! I don't understand this, and it hurts so much, but I thank You, because I trust You and I know You're good!" I have had to repeat this like a mantra through tears, through fears and much more... and still, I often have to include an admission of "I don't feel thankful right now, Father, but..." and just trust Him to work with my broken, fallen heart. He always does. I am absolutely convinced that, even though my emotions say otherwise at times, learning to speak out and grasp onto gratitude for His plans in EVERY circumstance has revolutionized my world - and my moments. I am thankful once again for a God who changes my eternity, changes my life and also changes my day. Praise You, Father! And THANK YOU!

From Top to Bottom

2011-08-01T07:14:00.000-05:00

Surprise surprise for a Monday... As I was reading this morning, a verse popped out at me - with a little thought tied to it. This was the passage: "And Jesus uttered a loud cry and breathed his last.And the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from top to bottom. And when the centurion, who stood facing him, saw that in this way he breathed his last, he said, 'Truly this man was the Son of God!'" (Mark 15:37-39, ESV).

What caught my attention was verse 38, in the middle there: "And the curtain of the temple was torn in tow, from top to bottom."

I love it when the Word throws in some little detail that, at least with me, often is passed over without notice, and certainly without consideration. And, then, out of nowhere, its existence suddenly catches my mind's eye, and a new revelation of God comes into my mind. I love it. God is so cool.

So, what's my big revelation today? Well, it may not be a "big" one really, but it's certainly significant, and no matter how often I re-receive this truth, it's always important. The detail that caught my attention was that the veil was torn from TOP to BOTTOM.

The veil, or the temple curtain, was the symbol of separation between God & mankind. The triumph of Jesus changed everything, and the separation that existed (as a result of sin) was mended and repaired by His death. Jesus' death was His act of taking the punishment for sin, rather than than the justice for our many human failings being ours to individually bear. He healed the rift with one amazing act. And that rift was symbolized by the curtain, and at the moment of His death, the curtain was ripped into two pieces, destroyed and rendered meaningless. And it was ripped from top to bottom.

I'm guessing many of you are getting where I'm headed by now; this repair, this action of reconciliation, of unification and healing was done. Hallelujah, right? This is, of course, a profoundly important truth and the very essence of what I hope my life celebrates day-by-day. It's big. But that small little detail - from top to bottom - is no less important. Perhaps, on a daily basis, living in this life here on earth, that detail may be the one of which I need more reminding.

When I have a barrier in my life - a situation that won't resolve, a feeling that won't pass, a hurt that won't heal - I tend to try to wrestle it on my own. Pretty much, though, I suck at trying to fix these things on my own. It turns out, again and again, that I'm not fit for accomplishing God's jobs; I have no idea why this continues to surprise me.

So, again today, I needed the reminder. These things (all things) happen from the top down. All the places in my life where I need healing, helping, repair and strength are His to accomplish. Life changes, the really important ones, happen from the top down. That leaves me free to simply trust His process, walk along behind Him (because sometimes there is work for me to do too!), and take His lead, knowing He'll work it out from the top. It's amazing that when I let His approach to life be my approach to life, things seem to go much more smoothly - inside my head and heart, as well as on the outside.

Bless you all. Let Him do His work, and trust Him. He's worthy.

Holiness is in the Practical

2011-04-28T18:00:00.008-05:00

I have had the incredible blessing and honor of helping to lead a group of women in a discipleship course for the last nine months. I've been through this course myself, and well, I knew going in that I'd be getting worked on as much as I'd be helping lead God's group... this coming week is our final meeting.

Each week, I email the girls and give them an update on homework, memory verses, etc... this week, however, a ~~little bit~~ huge amount of self-sharing poured out... What's below is an edited version of my email to the group. It seemed like a great thing to share here, although it's a little more self-revealing than what feels totally comfortable. At this point, though, I'm about as unashamed of my stuff as ever before, so here we go!

Oooh, oh oh oh oh...

I just told a friend this morning that God has hit me with something new in the last few days, and I think it may be what He's been working me up to for the last nine months... (although, as I also said to her, probably more like the last nine years or so, as I first came into recovery for my eating disorders 9 years ago). God's calling me to give up perhaps the last (and in some ways the first) of the things I still knowingly let stand in between my heart and His. And, I'm not afraid to admit to you all, I'm not exactly responding in a mature, submitted, gentle-hearted way.

I'll try to spare you all the lengthy details, but the long & short of it is that in this whole journey with my eating, I think I've learned some physical, medical, physiological, scientific things lately that have helped me to understand what is going on inside me... it's good research and blah blah blah, but it also rings true to my own experiences for the last 25 years and my Spirit has repeatedly responded with a little "nod" of acknowledgement. I'm no biochemist, but for me, He's revealing some truths.

The net result is that, in order to put an end to the ongoing harm I have been unknowingly doing to my body, I have some foods I need to give up - and probably give up 100% completely for at least 18 months until my body re-regulates some things. At that point, I may be able to here and there have a tiny bit of these foods, but I'll never be able to eat them in a "normal" way again.

I'm only a little ashamed to admit that, while I am concerned about the practicality and convenience factor of this path (especially for those with whom I frequently share meals and a few blessed loving souls who have lovingly taken on the challenge of preparing food for me), my biggest and most important internal reaction has been all about giving up these foods. The short list includes sugar and all things metabolized as sugar... trust me when I say that's a LONG list of foods. Even for someone who has already been not-eating gluten for years.

So, I find myself standing at a cross roads and obedience, faith, trust and surrender.

If I had been diagnosed with epilepsy or another more widely-understood something, an official, disease, and someone said I needed to make some changes to live healthfully with the condition, it'd be a no-brainer to me. It'd be time to accept and adapt. Likewise, if my vice of choice for coping was something more "bad," in our culture, it'd be easier for me to make that same leap. No one smiles and chuckles knowingly when people say, "You know, I have just had a terrible day! I'm going to go take a hot bath and do some meth!" But, hot bath + some ice cream to take the edge off? You all know as well as I do how accepted that is. And, really, maybe for many people (maybe most people!) a little ice cream to soothe isn't an idolatry issue. For me, however, God is pointing at that ice cream (and french fries and etc etc) and saying, "Hey, you let this stand in between me and your absolute surrender." The real question, I think, is whether or not I'm willing to give up the hard thing in order to be truly set-apart and more freed up to be His. More His.

I'm absolutely convinced that God is wooing my heart in a new way, and calling forth from me a new level of dedication...of consecration. And, you know, I wanted to share with you guys, for whatever reason, that 1) I'm in this space and that 2) I could be a little more lovely about how I'm responding. The first night after I felt sure confirmation of my suspicions that this was where I needed to go, I went and had bagels and animal crackers for dinner (things I won't be able to eat for the next 18 months at least). Last night? I made sure to eat some of the ice cream I was served, lots of it, actually. And today, I had given my self a free-for-all pass until I knew I'd be able to write & post this thing.... I've given myself a bit of a "last hurrah" permission slip. Not exactly the immediate jump to obedience I'd like to expect of myself, especially since I know I'm doing some physical damage in the meantime. But, hey, I'm just telling you the truth.

So... anyway, I'm really not sure what the point of me sharing all this is, but I felt like I was supposed to. The truth which I am starting to accept has a few layers: 1) I'm going to do this. 2) It's going to be an 18 month fast, and I'll take it from there. 3) I can't do this on my own. And maybe more than anything else, I'm afraid of failing. 4) I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me (Phil 4:13), so the real question is whether or not I BELIEVE the Word of God. If I do, then I just have to let Him be my strength. He definitely has the strength to carry me through any journey - but especially one that He's directed and doubly especially when its purpose is to draw me closer to my beautiful, Holy Father. As I've learned, discipleship isn't about knowing more about Jesus; it's about being more LIKE Him. I'm guessing He was allowed to eat sugar, but I have no doubts about His many, much bigger sacrifices. Oh mercy... in lieu of the recent reminders all over Holy week & Easter, I have fresh in my heart the taste of so much of His sacrifice. And He did it so I could do this. I think walking forward in obedience is the least I can do. And it also feels like the most. To say otherwise would be a lie. But now I get to learn new lessons about leaning on His strength daily in a whole new way. It'll be good.

Love you guys.

Excitement

2011-04-18T07:51:00.001-05:00

Alright, first and foremost, I gotta do a cheesy thing. I need to say that this post is a strange thank you to a dear friend of mine. I'm not going to tell you who she is, because, c'mon, that'd just be embarrassing... BUT, I'm going to tell her who she is (well, you get what I mean), and let her know that that, lest a Carly Simon song pops into her mind, she really isn't vain; this post really is about her...

So, I have this friend, and she's one of my best besties, and she loves the Lord in a pure and amazing way, and her heart and mind thirst continually for new levels of understanding. She taught me one of the best prayers I know: "Lord, show me what this scripture / truth / word looks like for me, because I don't get it." (I could wrote a whole separate treatise about that prayer alone!) But, more recently, she's taught me something new.

Actually, if I'm going to get stuck on accuracy (which apparently I am), she probably has been teaching me this lesson for years, but I think I'm just starting to learn it. Funny how teaching and learning don't always coincide the way it seems they should...

My friend; she's got the joy. And I mean it. You meet this woman and you know she's got the joy just wiped all over her pretty little face. It shines in her eyes, shows in her smile, and giggles out of her voice. I kid you not; it's even in her hair.

Now, needless to say, I love this girl, and she is a wonderful friend in all ways. And, as I'm pleased to say about all my closest friends, I have a lot to learn from her. But here's one that's just descended like a halo in the last few months: the girl gets excited.

Now, any one who knows me (or has read a post or two here) knows that I'm fairly excitable. I like exclamation point, smiley faces, dancing about in all sorts of unlikely places and shouting just about anything that seems worth shouting out to the world around me... but there is a world of difference between excitable and my already excited friend.

She looks at her life, and when she finds places of transition, uncertainty and the general shroud of mystery of which the Lord seems so very fond, she does an amazing thing. She gets excited. In a good way.

Do you know what I do when I see these things on my own horizon? Well, quite frankly, usually, I panic. I admit it freely; in my fleshly fleshly state, I so often see the gray area, the uncertain (or at least unknown to me) future and the questions as they loom large. And I freak. I am clever enough to freak in a very composed, appropriate and, sometimes, even reverent way, but make no mistake about it; I don't always keep my cool.

The cycle usually looks like this: fear leads to panic (this step happens very quickly) and then, at some point, I usually identify that I'm having a lapse in faith and I start talking some truth to myself. Or, when I'm smart enough to ask for help, one of the wonderful people in my life will speak some truth to me. (Don't you just love it when the truth is like a bucket of cold water or a slap against the face? One of those, "Good heavens, man! Snap out of it!" slaps? I do.) In any case, after the truth-smackdown, I get pulled back up out of the miry clay, and I get to regain my footing and walk in faith again.

And although I cycle through that process more and more quickly these days (not to mention less and less frequently), I definitely still feel an instinct to retreat from the unknown, the gray area and the shrouded. They just plain scare me. So, the Lord is working on me in that area, and I think my friend is one of His teaching tools.

You know what she does when she sees a vast, empty expanse of unknown future ahead of her? Like a crazy person, she gets excited. Where I tend to see a heavy curtain obscuring the path ahead, she sees a blank canvas. When I look out to the road and see only a few inches ahead of me, I tend to be frustrated and afraid. I'm pretty convinced that she spends very little time thinking about the few inches of road at her feet; instead, she just walks forward and gets all wonderfully stoked for whatever is past those few bricks at her feet. It's like she sees it as an exciting surprise coming her way; she doesn't know what it is, but she is certain it's going to be tons of fun.

Do you know what that is all about? I think I do. She believes Him. She believes the Word. I mean, she actually reads the words of God, believes He means it and that He means it for her. And she lives into the truth in the way only someone who really, really, really believes in His goodness, faithfulness and power can do: unafraid. It's incredible to watch, my friends. It's beautiful. And I want to be just like her when I grow up.

do have to believe Him when He tells me that it's good, and better than good. It's abundant, and it's more than I could ever hope or imagine (see Ephesians 3:20). Well, shucks. That is kind of exciting now that I think about it.

I'm grateful for the example in my friend, and I'm going to keep opening my heart up to learn this lesson as a living truth all my own. Maybe someday I, too, can have a mess of joy oozing out of every place. I can't imagine that wouldn't be for His glory. I mean, who doesn't want hair all gooey with the joy of Jesus? I do. I do, Lord! Teach me!

Suffering, Endurance, Character & Hope

2011-04-15T07:06:00.034-05:00

As I've recently written, I've undertaken a little challenge via the Living Proof Ministries Blog to, twice a month, thoroughly commit to memory a new verse. We start new verses on the 1st & the 15th, and as the new verse dates approach, I seek a word from God on what He'd like me to learn and let dwell in me richly (see Col 3:16). You know He's got purposes aplenty to accomplish in this girl! So far, I've had a verse surface each and every time I'm preparing to start a new one. God knows what I need; I'm so glad He's willing to share the info. :)

So, my verse for this half of April is actually a set of a few verses. It'll be a longer passage for memory, but I think I can get it locked in my head. For me, having the verse "click" in terms of meaning is the key to memory. So, with that in mind, I've got some initial thoughts on the passage that lays before me, my task for the next couple weeks: Romans 5:3-5 from the ESV.

"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us."

I've come across this verse before, and remember finding it a puzzling logical track. Suffering leads to hope? Uhhh...really?

Well, you know, I believe the Word is absolute truth and absolutely true, but I am not afraid to say right here and now that I find that logical leap to be a bit of a mystery. So far. I look forward to the next two weeks. Task one: word study. I know enough to know that I probably don't know what suffering, endurance, character and hope really mean (although, regulars here will know I've done some study on hope in past musings, thoughts and posts).

I'm sure I'll be popping in here to share what I'm discovering as I journey! For whatever reason, though, I wanted to loop y'all in on the front end of this discovery process. I'd love to hear your thoughts and insights or - better yet - experiences of learning this passage in your life! Comments always welcome on the blog!

You are blessed; show it to the world today!

What His Way Yields...

2011-03-24T21:45:00.000-05:00

I have a memory verse I've been trying to memorize for a month. I'm part of a group online in which each of us commit to learning a new memory verse on the 1st & 15th of each month; each person picks her own verse, and shares it via "comment" and then we go from there. My verse from March 1st was Psalm 86:11 in the NIV: "Teach me Your way, Lord, that I may rely on Your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart that I may fear Your name."

However, when March 15th rolled around, I still hadn't really committed this verse to memory... so I gave myself a do over; my verse for March 15th was Psalm 86:11 in the NIV: "Teach me Your way, Lord, that I may rely on Your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart that I may fear Your name."

If you are good at calendars, you may notice that, as I write this, it's nearly time for me to find and commit to a new verse. And with April quickly approaching, I knew I better get this baby memorized before it was time for a do-over do-over.

Then, tonight, for no reason of which I'm aware, I suddenly read the verse in a totally new way. I'm going to use the magic of italics to see if I can convey how it hit me:

"Teach me Your way, Lord, that I may rely on Your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart that I may fear Your name."

For the last month, I've been reading this verse, and honestly, focusing primarily on the second half. As I continue to identify and depose the idols in my life and heart, I was caught by the idea of asking God for an undivided heart. I love that concept! My heart can be so divided; this much I know.

And until tonight, the first part of the verse was sort of just introductory stuff. Poetry or the rote type of stuff that is all over the Bible. I hate to admit it, but I often read the Bible and find much of its truth falling without a second thought into the "nice Bible stuff" folder in the side drawer of my brain.

Thank goodness I'm not limited to my own natural tendencies (see side drawer filing system noted in previous paragraph). Tonight, the Holy Spirit taught me a new insight about this verse. The first part of the prayer is a request to be taught God's way. All month long, I bet I would have told you that it was God's "ways" - plural. I was thinking of it in terms of generalities: "teach me how You work." And, of course, this is a worthwhile prayer! BUT that's not what I see here tonight. Suddenly, realizing that this verse reads [singular] "way" put the idea of a specific context, incident or situation in my mind.

I imagined myself looking up at my Father, in the midst of my own trials and temptations to fear and doubt...and in the midst of that saying, "God, show me how You want this to look! Show me YOUR way to do this thing! Show me YOUR way to do this conversation or this waiting or this service." The most beautiful part tonight, however, is what came next. Inherent in the verse was the "if this, then that" truth I needed tonight. "Teach me Your way, Lord, that I may rely on Your faithfulness...." When I look to the Lord for His way to do life, and when I ask for His instruction and when I walk in His discipleship, I don't have to trust in my own understanding, or in those around me, or in the "odds" or anything else. I get to trust in, rely on and rest in His faithfulness. And the Lord is faithful absolutely.

As many times as I learn it, this lesson never ceases to be surprisingly new and fresh to my spirit; I hope that never changes.

Tonight, in my own deep dark crevices and cracks of life, I'm asking You, God, to show me Your way to walk this one out. I thank You that I can trust in Your teaching, in Your faithfulness to teach it and in all that will flow from there. Thank You, Lord for being who You are!

Resolved to being born again...

2010-10-05T12:00:00.000-05:00

Romans 12:2 says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."

I was thinking about the fact that allowing God to renew me - mind, body, heart & soul - requires a certain amount of commitment & resolve. In the abstract, His renewal and transformation sound like a great plan...but when it comes to walking that out, and making space for His work, I sometimes find myself truly challenged.

What I'm learning is that if I want to surrender results to Him, I also have to surrender the space in which the prep work happens. Sometimes this is space in my day, space in the construction of my life and, almost always, space inside my will & heart.

So, looking back at Romans 12:2, I see a tip: the word "pattern" jumps out at me. I think about the patterns in my thinking and in my behavior, the patterns in my emotional responses and reactions. This verse tells me that, in order to be transformed, I need to stop conforming to these patterns; I need to break out of the mold of my own life. I need to submit my actions to His will, and He does the transformation. That submission (oh, the "s-word!) is the key. And it's in the small, finite, one-at-a-time decisions that I submit. It's not a theory; it's a practice. And yes, I definitely need practice in order to get better at it.

Thankfully, the promised outcome is worth the resolve. One little day at a time!

Follow the Leader

2010-05-03T21:22:00.004-05:00

For a variety of reasons, I've been thinking more and more lately about letting God take the lead in new ways in my life. I've been learning and thinking and praying and studying about letting Him lead, and doing life His way. I've been learning about following Jesus. All told, I have a lot to learn, but I've come a few paces in the last few weeks, and I'm grateful. These meditations of my heart led to my inspiration for this writing. It's been awhile since I've been on this blog, and I think that's okay. I suppose it'll be an occasional thing for now. God's leading. I'm just along for the ride.

So, speaking of segues...

I've been thinking of the game "Follow the Leader" lately. Remember that one? Recess, circa 3rd grade? Tons of fun? Yeah, that's the one.

I've got this strange mental picture gelling in my mind... it's a line of children marching around a school yard. One of the kids is wearing a paper crown, and carrying a scepter made from a straw and some yarn. No idea why, but the yarn is clear in my mind's eye.

Anyway, this little boy, he's the leader and the kids trailing behind him, in various states of joviality are following along. Even the song - maybe from a Disney movie? - is playing softly in the background... "We're following the leader, the leader, the leader...We're following the leader, wherever he may go!"

So, I realize this is a delightful story, but what's the point, right?

Well, here's where I'm at with all this. God is encouraging me and teaching me that my life can look a lot more like that playground game than it has been. And I'll tell you what, I'm starting to really like the idea.

First, let's talk about being attentive. Think of kids on the playground, think of them playing this game... what are they focused on? No child in the scene in my head is trying to peer around the other kids to see where the leader is going. The little ones don't stand in line, worrying that the leader isn't taking a good path. They're not scoping out the eventual destination or landing point. They're busy trying to make sure they're doing a good job of following. Where God is going, and the path He's going to take to get there is none of my business, so to speak. He's very gentle with me, and so compassionate toward my human heart, and He gives me all kinds of mile-markers as we go, but the things I tend to get so wrapped up in: "where are You taking me, Lord?" And "Which path are you taking to get there?" really need be none of my concern. I'm learning to really internalize this idea of those kids on the playground. They're just having fun following along. And their attention is on the following.

Some more, um, advanced versions of follow the leader include mimicking the exact mannerisms of the kid at the front of the line. If he kicks to the left in front of the fence, all the kids in line are supposed to the same. If he jumps up and down, and does a little spin at the side of the pavement, we're all supposed to carry on in kind. So, if I'm following my leader, if I'm watching Jesus in the sights of my life, my attention needs to be not only on taking the path He takes, but on walking it the way He walks it. Following a leader is not only about going His way, but doing things the way He does them. Oh friends, there are so many levels to this truth, and God is painting them all over my heart and life right now!

There's one more thing...

Kids involved in the game, how do they seem to you as you imagine them? Sullen? Fearful? Anxious? No, probably not. They're having fun. In fact, the little image God's put on my heart has kids not only having fun, but thrilled to be engaged in the adventure, and (dare I say it?) the challenging excitement of doing things someone else's way! This part of the big picture lesson here is no less important than the first.

He came to give you & I freedom. He died so that you & I could live in freedom. Freedom. The idea of singing and jaunting around the playground of life, worrying only about imitating the next step and not about the when, where, how or which way of life seems pretty free to me. In fact, it seems gloriously released. Released from all the stuff of life, all the heaviness of trying to come up with some plan. He knows the plans He has for us. And it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. I'm not sure many of us could honestly say we don't see that truth play out in our lives again and again - as long as we're looking. And the challenge I feel in my heart is not only to receive the correction and keep my eyes on my own feet, on following the next steps, but also to embrace the adventure of it! To live with excitement and anticipation in the freedom of His good grace and splendid plans for me!

The God who created all isn't wandering aimlessly at a whim about the universe of our lives. He is carefully and masterfully helping orchestrate the most amazing reality you or I could possibly imagine - all because He loves us and delights in us. I see it so clearly as I type this out. His hope is that I, too, would delight in Him...that I would let go of all the earthy garbage I let get in the way of my game, and that I would run free and elated in His playground! He is at the head of the line, and He is going somewhere wonderful! My job is only to come up behind Him and enjoy the game!

Who

2010-01-29T11:11:00.000-06:00

There are a lot of important "who" questions in my pursuit of a life loving Jesus, but there's one that really has been speaking to me over the last 24 hours or so: who am I?

I don't mean this in a vague, teen-angst ridden way. I mean it as a question of my identity, my being. There are, of course, a plethora of ideas and teachings and wonderful truths out there about who I am in Christ, and while I value very, very much the impact of those truths in my own life, that's not even my focus today.

My focus is on the things that make me different from others, the features of my personality and my being that God put in place just for me, and the ways in which He designed me and created me. I'm talking about the things that make me me.

In a devotional shared with me last night, one of the ideas raised was the idea of standing strong in who I am and then trusting it's okay, and letting the responses (and perhaps reactions) of other people be something that is only for them to deal with, not me.

Now, there is, of course, a whole modern pop-culture attitude of, "I am who I am and if you don't like it, that's too darn bad and your problem." I'm not talking about that either. I am talking about living into, with confidence, the essence of who God created me to be - with grace, with peace and with quiet, kind strength. Just saying, without any unkindness, I am this. And letting that just sit there.

I am probably not alone in knowing that sometimes I slightly modify or curtail my personality because of the situation or setting in which I find myself. Different people bring out different sides of me, and dependent upon the roles in a larger group, I sometimes find myself feeling more one way or another. But sometimes, I also decide just to not say or do or be the thing or way I might be without a filter...simply because I'm considering how someone else might respond or reaction. For reasons I cannot quite explain, the judgment of others seems a terrifying prospect at times.

But my thought is this: God made me who I am. And perhaps the best way to appreciate and love Him is to appreciate and love His creation - exactly the way it is...or, rather, exactly the way I am.

There is freedom in embracing my true self. And I'm certain this is because, at the core, what I'm doing is embracing God's design for me.

So, my focus on "who" today, is on who I am. And in allowing God's true plans for me to unfold by letting His design be brightly shone... without fear. Or, at the very least, in spite of it.

What...

2010-01-28T11:11:00.003-06:00

Here's today's topic: What matters?

I was just venting tonight about some frustrations I'm feeling in a certain area of my life. I feel worn down and tired with the situation, and I feel helpless to effect real change in it overall. I feel angry at others involved who (in my view) are not helping to ameliorate the situation and lastly I feel unheard. Those who could make some significant impact on the course of events aren't behaving in the way that I think would be best.

Now, please have some grace with me and let's leave behind all the arrogance and self-focus in the paragraph above.

As I talked this out tonight, I was listening to myself and had to come to one conclusion. To make a difference, to be the light of the world, to live a breathing testimony, I need to be in a different head space. I need to focus on what really matters.

This situation is frustrating. Yes. Okay. And?

The situation is not within my immediate control. Okay. And?

This situation may last for awhile. Ah, shucks...bummer. But okay. And? What else?

Well, the what else is that be those facts as they may, they still are what they are for now. And while I think it's okay and healthy to vent to my confidants about such things, if I stay focused there, I miss my opportunities for impact...and am likely to also exponentially increase the likelihood that I will cause some harm or damage to my testimony, rather than glorify God in my being.

So, now what? Well, the what is that I focus on what matters. I focus on what is. And I focus on what is demonstrated to those in my path. I am not the only one frustrated in this matter; this I know for sure. I am not the only one with legitimate concerns; it's actually quite the contrary. So, rather than focus on my own agenda, my own frustration & my own feelings of injustice and aggravation, what if I chose on focusing on the what that matters: what I can do and what story my actions tell.

I could focus on the frustration of those I am interacting with. I could focus on how I could help them, even in small ways. I could focus on grace. I could focus on remembering that we live before a great cloud of witnesses - and that's not only in the heavenly realm. And I can focus on bringing glory to His name.

I've said it many times, and again in recent writings here, but I will say it again: I want others to look to me and see God. I want them to realize there's something different. I want them to sense in a place past their reason that His Spirit makes my day different than it could be otherwise. I want them to feel His love, to feel His care and His grace. And those things can come through me, if I let Him work... and that means focusing on what matters. Focusing on what He calls me to - every day. I'm not called to love only on days when I feel up to it. I'm called to be a living sacrifice and follow in His footsteps. Without these daily sacrifices, it's hard to even begin to be living as Jesus did. So, I will surrender my right to be focused on ME for today. And instead, I will focus on His plan, His will, His "what."

Where

2010-01-27T11:11:00.001-06:00

An easy question that I think I have had a lot of confusion about in the past is where to start. And I mean in the pursuit of a life following Christ. Where do I begin?

I lose my way all the time, and there are (thankfully!) a hundred different places to start. Most simply, I start where I am. But then where do I go?

After reading my writing about why I get up in the morning, a friend asked, "How do I do it if I don't feel like I have the strength to love? How do I get to where you are?" Her question prompted the answer that has become today's post about where:

"I say this with love: you're starting with the wrong premise. You don't start by trying to love others. You start by working on receiving His love. And, believe me, if you're anything like me, it can a lot more work than loving others. Your primary task is to be in relationship with Him. That should be your primary goal: to know Him more, to learn Him better.

Pray. Read the Bible. Seek solid teaching. Search for Him. You will find Him.

He does all the rest.

Seriously.

You don’t need strength. The Bible teaches us that His strength is made perfect in our weakness He'll take you just the way you are.

And do amazing things with your life.

You just have to let Him have it.

And then receive what He gives in return.

It's harder than it sounds. It's not all pretty flowery loveliness. It's work sometimes. I know I am nearly certain sometimes that I don't deserve His love or that I have to earn it somehow.

That's a lie. I don't.

You don't.

Sometimes, I'm convinced, He allows our hearts to break so that we have a crack we can allow Him into.

Not saying that His purpose is about allowing you to hurt...but I am saying it's a worthwhile use for the breakage."

And that’s where you start. With the broken places, and letting Him have them – wholesale. And the rest is His work flowing outward. He does it. I just get to be along for the ride.

The "Why"

2010-01-26T11:11:00.001-06:00

After having written a few posts about “how,” I’ve been led down an interesting path: question words. Today we talk about the “why.”

I had a friend ask me, “Why do you wake up in the morning? Why do people get up in the morning?”

In the midst of answering here, I managed to get to a clear answer for myself. I realized that, not unlike the how questions, the why questions are incredibly important. I need to know why so I can share it; it’s a part of my witness and testimony. Here is what I shared:

“I know it sounds cheesy, but I really do like my life. And even on the days when I don't feel like I like my life, I trust God. Truly. I BELIEVE with every ounce in me that He has good plans for me, and that He is fulfilling them in me day by day and through me. My purpose is to point to Him in whatever ways I can and let others see Him and go, "Wow, that's good. He is good."

And that is not only incredibly gratifying, but it's incredibly worthwhile.

Sometimes that looks like me loving the heck outta my boyfriend - by just doting on him, or sometimes by calling him out on things... both can be loving actions. Sometimes it means showing up for a friend. Sometimes it means kicking butt at my job and letting people know that I believe God is the one who's given me my abilities.

My purpose is to love.

Love you. Love my honey. Love my parents, my family... love those little nieces, and love my employees and co-workers and staff. And strangers in the grocery store and waiters and everyone.

I can't do it all at once, but I can do it because He loves me and when I focus my attention on letting HIS love be the source for everything, there is abundance and overflow and I can't help but love people a little better and a little more than I could on my own.

And that brings glory and pleasure to God, and that's enough.

But for my human side, it also brings pleasure to me.

Pleasure in knowing I can help a niece when someone else might not know what to say, or that I can share encouragement with a frustrated co-worker. Or that I can support my man in his pursuit of a dream.

It's not about me. But it feels good to me.

And the more I do it, and the more I decide to do it - even when I don't feel like it - the more growing closer to God pays off. And it's out of that wealth of joy that He alone brings that I can get up every day and say, "Yes, this day is good."

Even on days when I might have to say it through tears. As preachy as I hope I don't sound, it is true. When I really made that decision to surrender my heart to Christ, 100%, with no holds barred... everything changed. I changed. Life changed. My heart changed. And it all changes more and more every day. He changes me. He renews minds and restores hearts. He puts together broken things and binds up hurting wounds. That's what Jesus came for. That was the entire WHY. To fix our brokenness.

And when I let Him, and the more I let Him, the more I truly do feel like I could practically jump out of bed every day. Not that I do. And sometimes I don't want to get out of bed at all. But a lot less than I used to. Almost never. I have to start by saying thank You. And acknowledging Him for who He is.

He is the Restorer, Redeemer, Healer and FRIEND.

And He makes life worth living. It's a pretty nifty trick.

So, I guess I'll finish with, "I get out of bed because He loved me enough to put me on earth so that I could." Everything else flows out of that.”

My How To

2010-01-25T11:11:00.002-06:00

I wrote Friday about the importance of being able to understand and articulate our own methods of living by faith, what it means and the practical aspects of living it out day-by-day.

I started my rambling post discussing the current case-in-point for me: learning to surrender the idol of my own road map and yielding full guidance to God.

So, how do I?

Well, for me, every time I feel frustration rising with my own foiled plans, or even when I just start thinking about them and making plans in my own mind, I make sure to ask for help! More than anything else, I ask for help! Sometimes that help means I seek out a friend and ask for good wise and Godly counsel; often it means I ask a friend to listen. Always it means I turn to the Lord and ask for His help. I know I can't cast down an idol of my own power any more effectively than I can do anything else.

I also say I'm sorry. I tell the Lord that I see my own sin and I affirm my sincere desire to live according to HIS ways. And I ask (again) for His help and leading.

Sometimes I just talk my way through His approach. I have a small mental stack of verses that I plow through - often aloud. I find it really helps. I affirm my belief that He knows the plans He has for me, and that they are plans to prosper me (Jer 29:11). I affirm my belief that He works all things together for my good (Rom 8:28). And I thank Him for the truth that, while there are many plans in the hearts of man, it is the Lord's purpose that prevails (Prov 19:21).

And then I praise and thank Him...lavishly if I can. I thank Him for who He is, and for what He does for me. And again and again, I THANK Him for being bigger than I am, for knowing more than I do. I thank Him for showing me my errors and for being willing to Love me again and again. I thank Him for being right and for teaching me. I thank Him for frustrating me; it's how I learn. I thank Him for knowing what I need, and I thank Him for making sure I am not cheated. I thank Him for loving me enough to help me learn things the hard way - in those situations where no other method seems to be working. And finally, I thank Him for being who He is: trustworthy, in charge and always looking out for my best interests.

My heart changes when I pray. My heart changes when I pray scripture. And the whole world changes when I let Him change my heart. And that is my how-to.

How to "how to"?

2010-01-22T11:11:00.001-06:00

In years past, I have spent much energy being frustrated with a lack of instruction. I would read books or listen to sermons that would espouse all sorts of direction about the ideals of life, the guidance of the word and the importance of the pursuit of righteous living. Yet, so often, I would leave these times of teaching with a feeling that what was said was great, and that I agreed with it (mentally), but that I had absolutely no idea how to do it...how to live it, or live into it.

As I've been writing this blog, I've learned that it is really really easy to prattle on about what I am personally pursuing, without ever giving thought to mentioning the how.

In part, what I have learned is that the "how" is something I sometimes have to figure out for myself. Sometimes, my "how" looks completely different from the how of a friend. We each have our own paths, our own relationships with God and our own selves. So, sometimes, the how is wholly unique.

At the same time, I have learned that there are many good teachers who share about their own approaches and that, sometimes, my approach is influenced and shaped by using theirs as a guidepost.

With that in mind, I've been looking lately at my own realization that I had put a lot of faith in my own plans, and not put much energy toward the Lord's direction in one particular area of my life. I simply wasn't conceding control to Him; I had not yet come to that place of yield. Or, rather, I'd perhaps been there, but had packed up my things and carried on my merry way alone for some time now.

I've continued to write & pray about how important it is that I repent (simply: stop & reverse course). Yet, I have been asking myself, "How do I do that?" What does it look like?

So, this will be a two-part posting... First, today, I want to focus on the importance of understanding and sharing my own how-to.

When I walk through the halls of my (largely unbelieving) office, the halls of my home, or even the halls of my church, I have a million opportunities to demonstrate to others what it means to be a follow of Jesus. And I could wax poetic for hours about the amazing impact that decision has had on my life and how valuable it is every day. Yet, if there is no clear way for me to share with someone how they can do that too, I lose a lot of opportunity for effective witness.

It's often discussed that we, as believers, ALL should know how to share about our faith and lead others towards Christ and salvation. Yet, many of us feel intimidated by and afraid of this prospect. Our pastor at church likes to say, "if you don't know how to tell someone about Jesus, just invite them to church and I'll do it for you!" His offer is a generous one; many of us don't know how. And I fully admit that, at times, I have no idea myself.

What I will say is that I have found it much more effective to tell someone what I have done and how it has worked for me, rather than telling them what they should do. I admit 100% that I have no real idea what's "best" for me in the big picture of life, and I wouldn't put on the airs of saying I could tell you what's best for you either. That's not really my job in many ways. What I can do, however, is tell you where I've been, tell you how Jesus has changed my life and tell you what it looks like for me to follow Him today...and of course, what that means for my life and its direction on a daily basis. And hopefully I can live out for you in a million ways the blessing of living committed to Him.

I find that this method of communication is also much better received. When I am telling you about me, I come from a place of sincere humility. This is just my story. If I start to tell you what you should do, I step into a place I'm not often supposed to be. So I try not to go there. Don't get me wrong; we all have advice and wisdom to share, and that kind of relationship is part of the picture of friendship, love and commitment demonstrated in the Bible. I just try to keep proper perspective about how I live that out.

So, if you've been kind enough to forgive my rambling, I will wrap up for today. I invite you to consider the "how" of your faith. What does it look like? In your outward practice (quiet time, church attendance, service, etc)? How does it impact the way you make decisions? The way you prioritize your time? The way you look at the world around you - in micro view? These are the things that, when demonstrated, are powerful witness to the world around us. When demonstrated and then articulated to an inquiring friend, they can help clarify things that it may otherwise take much more seeking to understand.

So, I ask you to consider...how? How do you do it?

It's Not About Me

2010-01-21T11:11:00.001-06:00

So, as many of you know, I've been writing a lot lately about waiting on God. And, as is always the case, the things I'm writing about a lot are the things I'm also thinking and praying about a lot. A lot. A loooot.

And recently, I had yet another of revelation. I have to admit that I pause before I write this. This "revelation" I'm about to share about seems so elementary in hindsight. But, really, in all-sight, I am so elementary. So I guess it is what it is!

I was recently praying about and reflecting upon my understandings of the ways in which I've made my own best plans an idol. I had been relying upon them so heavily and trusting in them. I had taken (initial) direction from the Lord and plowed ahead without much surrender to His ways on the daily path to His appointed destination.

And what I recognize now as a natural by-product of that approach to life has been an under-the-surface, but persistent certainty that the reason things weren't going the way I thought they should was because I was somehow inadequate.

Many times, I've had to recognize a belief that something God wasn't doing was NOT because God was waiting for me to "get it right" before He'd love or bless me. Now, don't get me wrong; I do believe that persistent sin can stand in the way of persistent blessing. However, it is contrary to the Word and nature of God to believe that He punishes me for my inadvertent human failings.

This lately realization, however, wasn't focused on my actions. I wasn't thinking that because I'd done something "wrong," God was withholding His hand. Rather, I realized that my not-quite-articulated internal belief was that God was doing something to me (and yes, I use the phrase "to me" intentionally) because I, in the very essence of my being, was not good enough. I was believing a lie (straight from the pit!) that because I was not "good enough" (and yes, for me, that lie is always just some vague reference to general shortcoming), God wasn't going to take care of me.

Ick.

Like I said, a lie straight from the pit. God's word is FULL of affirmation that He loves us in spite of our fallen state, and in fact, nearly every act chronicled in the Bible centers on His action-packed pursuit of a loving relationship with us, despite our fallen, messed up, imperfect state. He loves me. And just as I love others, I would not withhold my help from them simply because I am repelled by their imperfection. And God does not treat me or you this way either.

I was grateful for the reminder. He came so that I might have life, and have it in abundance. No holds barred. The only caveat is that I commit my heart to Him, surrender to His ways and believing Him fully - day by imperfect day!

Expecting You

2010-01-19T11:11:00.001-06:00

As those of you who've been reading the last week or two will know, I'm in the middle of a little bit of a revelatory period here. I'm seeing an important area of my life in which I've been holding onto control and focusing my attentions on a plan of my own design.

I was praying about the wholesale change I need God to help create in my heart and life in order to grow into a greater place of surrender to and dependence on His plans and His designs. I've realized that much of what makes it difficult to surrender and truly embrace His plans is a lack of trust. I feel afraid that His plan won't be as "good" as mine, or that I won't get what it is that I think I want and need as it unfolds.

Of course, these fears are unfounded...in fact, even more than being unfounded, they are flatly contrary to the truth of the Word. Yet, fear (as the absence of faith) is just that, is it not?

So, I started praying and realizing I needed to grab onto hope to get me to the place of really grabbing onto and embracing belief. I started to think about the use of the word "hope" in the Bible. This is a concept I've written about before, and love. The hope of the Bible is a hope not of wishing and wondering, but instead of expectation. And as I prayed, I realized the thing I "hoped" for more than all else was for the Lord's will, the Lord's way and His hand. The wonderful truth about this desire is that I am absolutely guaranteed that I can hope in FULL expectation of Him!

So, for today (and every day!) that is my prayer - for full expectant, overflowing, busting at the seems hope of His will, His plan and His way. I know He delivers - right on time, every time. Hallelujah!

I'll Take it From Here, part 2

2010-01-15T11:11:00.001-06:00

I'm going to start where I left off yesterday... if you missed it, check out this post to get yourself oriented: Part 1.

So, that gem of a verse from Proverbs? It's no surprise to me that I've found it necessary to memorize this one. Ah the Spirit knows my heart and guides me where I need to go! Check out the translation from The Message: "We humans keep brainstorming options and plans, but God's purpose prevails." I actually had to laugh when I first read that version. Ain't that the truth!

So, here's where I have found myself to be: I listened for God's will as to my destination, and once He supplied it, I went a little outlaw and worked primarily off my own best ideas and plans. And, as I've written about earlier this week, I even found myself nearly irate when God didn't seem to be complying with all the plans I'd made.

I realized that my anger and frustration were rooted in that idol I've shared about: my plan. "But this is not according to the plan!," my heart cries out. "Whose plan?," asks the Spirit. "Well, mine."

Ah yes. I keep brainstorming options and plans, but I'm not the only one with a plan: "For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." (Jeremiah 29:11, NLT)

Oh heavenly God, I am so grateful for Your plans! And thankful that even when I say, "I'll take it from here," and then find myself wandering in the wilderness, You are forgiving enough to say, "Now I will take you from here," and You pick me up and lead me aright again.

Thank You, Father, for Your grace. Help me to desire Your will AND Your way. Lord, conform my plan to Yours and let me depend on You for leading in every step.

I'll Take it From Here, part 1

2010-01-14T11:11:00.000-06:00

Many of you know that Hebrews 11:8 has been a favorite of mine for a long time: "By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going."

What has appealed to me about this verse is the reminder that, even though I may have no idea the directions in which God is leading me, I can follow Him faithfully and, later, I trust in the fact that the unknown place to which He is leading will be my inheritance of joy and promise. I've put a lot of energy and effort (as longer term readers will know!) into stepping forward into the unknown and embracing His faithfulness as my promise of security in the way told of in this very verse.

But oh how subtle and tricky life can be! Or how dense, perhaps, my little human mind can be! I've recently uncovered a new area in my life where I need to apply similar principles to those used when stepping, on faith, into the unknown. The difference is just subtle enough that I, in my headstrong self-reliance, have managed to miss it for quite some time now. And all the while, I've just been stepping deeper and deeper into that trap that comes when I start to trust in my own ways.

Though they sometimes feel few & far between, there are areas in life in which I've felt God step in and say, "Hey, this is where I'm taking you. The destination looks like this." A friend summarized my own situation perfectly when she said, "It's like you took that direction and said, 'Okay, great. Thanks for the end-point. I'll just go ahead and take it from here.'"

I have to stop and observe that my frequent prayer (like many of you, I'm sure) is for God's direction in my life. Yet, when I think about that, I have to laugh. In some ways, I have listened only long enough to hear information about the target-point. Yet, that's not really all of it, is it? When I ask a friend for directions to her house, I generally expect more than the name of the subdivision or neighborhood. I'm saying, "Alright, I see that I'm coming to your home. Now, how do I get there?" Yet, with the Lord, in some pretty important areas, I've done a terrible job of asking "How do I get there?" Once He's said, "You're heading to this place," I've just gone on my merry way.

And yet...

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21

And Hallelujah for that truth! (Although, I admit, it's that same truth that - at times - has frustrated me to distant end!)

So, then what? Then I wait on the Lord. Lord, I ask not only where we are going, but how it is You should like me to get there. Guide me, Friend & Father, guide me!

My Plan the Idol

2010-01-13T11:11:00.005-06:00

I found myself getting really frustrated with God recently, and I knew this had to be pointing to some sort of rebellion in me. And really, it's not like it's that subtle of an issue to ferret out. When I'm unhappy with the way God is doing something, it means my heart is not submitted to His ways of doing...well, everything.

In my particular example, I've been really frustrated with the timing on a particular issue. And I know I'm not the only one who has issues like this come up regularly. And I can come up with a million rationalizations or excuses ("Well, so-and-so has been really busy" or "Oh the wheels of corporate America run slowly", etc), but the bottom line is that God is in charge of ALL timing...decisions of family, schedules of friends and even the wheels of corporate America. And so, my beef was with God.

I came quickly to a realization that I needed to get that rebellious attitude in check immediate, and thankfully He is gracious to help me do just that. As I started looking deeper at this issue, however, I realized that my frustration was rooted in a sense that my plans were being foiled again and again - by God. No wonder I was angry! I was viewing God as my opponent - and He is a fierce competitor!!

I realized that my "plan" had become my idol. I had put so much faith and energy into it; I had hung my hopes on it. And each time the mental milestones had been bypassed or missed or routed entirely, my own human nature would just work to create a new, revised version of "the plan." This planning happens almost automatically and unconsciously for me; it is so much a part of my own personal nature. And each time I had to revamp the plan, I got frustrated. I might as well have been calling out to the heavens, "Hey! I'm working on something here! Do you mind?!?!"

It's a wonder it took me so long to hear what I think God as (essentially) been calling back down to me, which is: "Hey, I'm working on something here! Do you mind?"

Until He decides to take next steps, I am going to be getting a lot of practice surrendering this one. Each time I start walking through the plan, mentally working on contingencies (which I do a lot!), I'm going to have to stop and cast this one down again. Thanks for being with me on the journey!

Hissy Fit

2010-01-12T11:11:00.001-06:00

So, I had to have another hissy fit at God this weekend. I found myself just so, so frustrated! I basically interrupted another conversation so I could go have a little "discussion" with my God and King.

It's hard sometimes to remember that, although He IS Lord of all creation, it is okay for me to come to Him with openness and frankness. I can speak to him with deference and respect, but also express that I'm angry and frustrated and feeling cranky.

The wonderful thing about sharing with the Lord is that somehow, by the amazing power of His grace, it changes me. Sure, my prayer my start out with my underlying message being that I would like to change GOD, but I usually end such prayers with a new heart for submission and Biblical gentleness, knowing that, instead, I need to let Him change me.

His ways are perfect; His ways are just. He is working for my greater good; He is working for your greater good. He has all things under His control, and He knows what He is doing. Trust Him. The righteous will live by faith, and He will not disappoint.

No Jesus, No Peace

2010-01-11T11:11:00.002-06:00

It's part of a popular "slogan," and has been featured on many bumper stickers, and although it irks me to admit it, I must do so: that saying is really true.

If you're not familiar, the saying is this:

No Jesus, No Peace

Know Jesus, Know Peace

I believe I've written about this topic before, but I have again been struck by how difficult it must be to live life without a relationship with Jesus, and rooted in the Word. I remember realizing a few years ago that the "instruction manual" people are always quipping doesn't exist really does. The Bible provides for us direction and guidance that, when engaged as a part of and fuel for our living, breathing relationship with Christ, can and will guide us to the right path each and every time.

I've wondered lately at bickering co-workers, spouses whose relationship has fallen into disrepair and parents who find themselves at wit's end with how to approach their children...or perhaps children at the same spot in regard to their parents. How to act? What to do? Which direction to shoot for? What is the ideal worth seeking?

These are questions I know I once asked in my own heart time and time again. Now, I feel flooded with gratitude as I reflect on the fact that I know the answer to the questions. I may not know what my searching will find, but I at least know where to look to begin the search. And I am overwhelmed when I look at my non-believing friends and their dismay at how to handle life. I will do what I can to point them toward God and His ever-loving, faithful, supportive hand, but beyond that, I can only pray. And pray I do, and pray I will. My heart goes out today to those who find themselves wandering in search of a path. I, myself, wander on the path quite often, but at least I know which road I am walking.

Tomorrow's Portion

2010-01-08T11:11:00.001-06:00

It's so easy for me to get "spun up" about various things in my daily life. This is an area where the enemy frequently tries to get to me. I can get ahead of myself so easily.

I have to remind myself frequently about the truth revealed in Matthew 6:34: "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

It's so easy to get sucked into tomorrow; it's easy for many of us to also worry. Naturally, many of us worry about tomorrow. First of all, it's clear from the verse above, that we are commanded not to worry. This isn't just a suggestion or a feel-good motto suggested by Jesus; this is a command. He says, "Do not...." Plain and simple. And that should be enough. Jesus said don't, so I won't.

However, for me, I do find it easier to follow this command when I remember all the other good reasons to do so. Not only does worrying do no good, it's not necessary. Most importantly, it's not necessary at all.

God will provide for us. He takes care of me today. He has always taken care of me, and He WILL take care of tomorrow. That's how He is; steadfast, faithful and trustworthy.

Sometimes the hardest part is realizing I need to let go and trust God, but it's important to try to stay on top of this one. I can actively believe God for His portion for me tomorrow - each and every time. And when I do, it's easier to enjoy and appreciate the manna He's given me for today.

Core Lies

2010-01-07T11:11:00.001-06:00

I had a great conversation with some friends this weekend that got me thinking about the "core lie" in my life. The enemy has many tricks, but as I think I've written here before, it's said that he's persistent, but not particular creative. This has certainly been true in my life, and the more closely I examine my own history, the truer this seems.

Of the devil, the Bible tells us that "He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies." John 8:44

It seems strange to have one, but I'd have to say this is one of my favorite verses about Satan. It reminds me of who he is and what he's about. He's in the business of deception; in fact, he is the father of lies! The FATHER of lies! Think about what that means; it is from him that lies are birthed and born.

This is a very true statement in my own life, and as I look at the lies with which he tries to goad me, they often tie back to a very small deck of fundamental or "core" lies.

For example, let's say that I have deep insecurities about being unintelligent or (in the language I think more of us are most likely to use with ourselves) stupid. Well, the enemy may not sit and whisper into my ear, "You're stupid! You're stupid!" all day. BUT, he may instead craft this lie into slightly more sophisticated versions to help infiltrate my entire life more completely. For example, at work, I may struggle to feel like my boss values my input. I may find myself saying things like, "Well, I don't know. I'm not sure I have the experience I need for this position." It may even be true that I have less experience than some of my peers, but the reason I give voice and energy to this self-doubt is that I am tied into that root deception that I'm a stupid person.

This could also show up (and most certainly would) in other areas of my life. If I am living in a way that believes the lie of my own stupidity, I might also struggle with fear about being a good parent. Perhaps a child of mine might struggle with school or a behavioral issue; I may find myself overly reactionary or fearful in response. Why? Maybe deep down, I am afraid I can't help my child, and in this faux story, let's just say that it might be because I find myself believing Satan's lie that I don't know how to handle my child; I don't know what to do next, and I can't figure it out. Translation: I am believing I'm stupid.

At the end of the day, this all boils down (as so much does!) to a question of who it is I am going to believe. The Word tells me that I am wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14); it also tells me that I am made thoroughly competent for the tasks He sets before me as I dwell in Him & His word (2 Tim 3:16-17). So, who is it that's telling me this core lie of stupidity? The enemy, of course. He is, afterall, the father of lies.

I have been praying and will continue to pray for revelation about the core lies I believe without even realizing it. I am certain they show up in many ways in my life - subtle and not-so. The word of the Father is pristine and right; the word of the darkness is life killing and contrary to His goals for you. Believing in the One worthy of your every faith!

The Grief of Sin

2010-01-06T11:11:00.001-06:00

I have recently had a new experience I wanted to share here. I am coming to understand it as some important growth in my on walk with the Lord.

After identifying and acknowledging some recent areas of rebellion and sin, I found myself truly overcome with sadness and sorrow. There were expected (at least with me!) accompanying tears, pangs of deep ache and a sense of true anguish...and don't get me wrong; I know those are dramatic words. But the emotions were dramatic!

I wasn't sure how exactly to understand this at first. In the midst of these times, I was also actively and fervently seeking the Lord and praying for His forgiveness and peace to be with me. I worried that I was falling prey to an enemy trap to feel bad about myself or falling into self-judgement, but when I examined my heart, I didn't find shame or condemnation. Instead, what I realized, was that I had discovered a grief of sorts. I was lamenting and grieving my own sin. I believe the Lord's grace has led me to a new level of understanding and wisdom in the area of repentance. I felt truly saddened by the reality of my own fallen condition.

These times didn't last particularly long, nor have they lingered (and that lingering, for me, would have been an important signal that "something else" was going on). They were simply a part of my experience of repenting (or, more simply put, turning away from my sin) and asking for forgiveness from my Father.

A conversation with a friend prompted me to wonder about the Biblical foundation (or potential lack thereof) for such an experience. I quickly was reminded of many of David's penitent Psalms, and the Lamentations themselves. The word is truly plentiful with examples of faithful servants approaching God with not only apology, but sincere sadness for their transgression.

As it stands today, I don't have such an intense experience "every" time I find new places of sin in my life; I just understand that to be part of life. Some things are one way, and some things aren't. The mysteries of that balance are in His hands. I am, however, grateful to be feeling (and then releasing!) true sorrow for hurting the Father's heart. I am beyond grateful for His grace and forgiveness, always available to me.

People

2010-01-05T11:11:00.001-06:00

Hello All! Welcome back for 2010 and I hope you all had wonderful Christmases! We had a truly blessed time, and I am so excited for what God has in store for 2010...

Now, onto the regular business:

Many of us are familiar with the oft quoted Proverb, "As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another," and it is the basis for my writing today (it's Proverbs 27:17).

I've been thinking about this and its application in various areas of my life. A wise mentor shared the idea that this "sharpening" process is the specific purpose of marriage. This was a new idea for me in some ways. I tend to apply this verse more to those people in my world who are difficult or challenging to deal with... and to friends who help keep me accountable. But the suggestion was that marriage itself serves this purpose. Yes, our spouses can be (and hopefully are!) important people in the accountability of our lives, but the situations that come up in marriage and other intimate relationships really do fit perfectly with the idea of a metal being honed.

Sometimes, those to whom I am closest are the ones who rub up against me in the ways that I find most bothersome...and by "bothersome," I mean frustrating. :)

The image in my head is that of a metal smith carefully crafting the iron in His hands; He selects the right tools to do the job, and the right times to apply fire and heat. And then He creates and molds. So, the idea that those who love me best and know me in intimate ways are also those who the Artist chooses to press into me, to use to sharpen me, makes sense.

For me, this is a helpful way to think about challenging situations that arise in these close relationships - marriage and others that are deeply intimate: they're the hands of the Maker, honing His beloved art.

Lessons

2009-12-23T11:11:00.001-06:00

I have this way of training new people on my team at work that I think works really well. I have them work with more experienced team members for awhile...in this process, they're being helped step by step with someone telling and reminding them of whatever they need to know. Eventually, I will set them off to work on their own. Then, someone more experienced will review their work. Then, the reviewer takes a very specific approach to providing correction. If there (for example) 4 mistakes, the reviewer will tell the new person, "Okay, you have 4 things that need to be corrected. Can you figure out what they are?"

If they take a second pass and find 3 of the 4, I will then ask them to go through each individual element or decision and consider why they've completed it in the way they have - letting them know they're still missing 1. Usually, they find the 4th mistake this way. But if not, I'll tell them which thing is wrong, and then challenge them to come up with the correct thing on their own. Finally, if they're still stuck, I will go ahead and give them the corrected version. And then we do the same thing all over again.

My experience with this approach to training is that, as long as the initial "hand holding" stage is thorough, it usually moves quickly. New employees learn to identify, work through and correct issues on their own, and they become self-sufficient for all intents & purposes.

I've seen this parallel lately in my own life and some of the things the Lord has been teaching me this year. As longer term readers will know, early in 2009, the Lord kicked off a pretty "exciting" journey driving me toward deeper belief. I put exciting in quotation marks, because although the results are exciting and the process was dynamic, much of it has been sort of painful and painstaking. I guess I'm a slow learner in this area!

None the less, as the year has progressed, I am seeing the progress in His curriculum for me. Early in the year, I needed to write about, meditate on and study up on believing Him on a pretty daily basis. I was starting from scratch in so many ways! And as the year has gone on, I've needed refreshers. I have had plenty of my own instances where I have had the Lord say, "You're missing 3 things. Can you figure out where they are?" And, at least in this metaphor, they might be 3 ways in which I was not believing Him and His truth.

So, last night, I had a realization about some big ways in which I have not been believing God. I have been relying on my own best ideas for clarity and direction in many ways. So, I had a good heart to heart with the Father and asked for forgiveness and resolutely turned back in a Godly direction (viz., I repented). And as I was digesting all this inside myself, I was realizing that I, too, am being trained and that some of God's process for tutelage resembles training I've done in more practical areas of my own life.

At first, He was giving me direct and blatant reminders about believing all the time. And as I've learned, and put into practice the things I'm learning, I have needed less and less reminding. Now, naturally, part and parcel with being a student is the fact that, sometimes, I lose my way and don't know what I'm doing. When those times come, I need only go to the Teacher and He sets my path straight. For me, the hard part is sometimes 1) realizing I've gone astray and 2) remembering its as simple as turning to Him. But when I do, He always gets me going. He is a patient, kind and amply capable Instructor. I am so grateful!

The Truth under the Truth

2009-12-22T11:11:00.001-06:00

Let's do a quick review of a few things that the Bible has to say about truth:

"LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill? He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart..." Psalm 15:1-2

"Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.." Proverbs 12:19

"A truthful witness saves lives, but a false witness is deceitful." Proverbs 14:25

"Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth." Proverbs 16:13

"The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." Psalm 145:18

So, I know it may be a foregone conclusion at this point, but it does seem pretty clear that the Word is in favor of truth all the way, right?

Well, that may seem a little "duh" at first glance, but let's dig a little deeper; the topic I want to address today isn't just simple truth - as in, "Did you go to the store?" and then saying no, when really you did. That's about lying more than anything. My point is about digging another layer deeper into our surface truths and finding what lies beneath them...and then living that out into the world...and not just because sometimes it's helpful, but because it honors God.

So...what do I mean about something underneath our surface truths? Well, let's make up an example: a husband & wife are discussing their plans for the holidays. They're talking about whether or not to host a Christmas party for their friends and family. The very social wife is all for it, but friction is building because her husband seems reluctant. "Well, I just don't know if I really want to have that much hustle and bustle around the holidays. I'd like it to be quieter." The wife is perplexed; her husband also loves people and she can't understand why having more "quiet" seems appealing. It makes no sense to her.

Well, rather than let this post take 10 years to write out, I'm going to jump ahead a bit... what is really going on for the husband is that he is missing quiet time with his wife. He wants some more time to connect and build their intimate connection. His resistance to hosting a Christmas party isn't about not wanting to host or Christmas parties. It is truthful that he doesn't want to host the party, but his resistance doesn't have a thing to do with Christmas parties, and instead is about what he wants and needs in their relationship.

This is a little off my normal topic style, but I really have been hit between the eyes lately with the realization of just how important the whole truth is. And I can leave out the entire truth without even knowing it...when I hurry and am not thoughtful and mindful about what I say and communicate.

So, I thought I'd check the Bible for some input, and realized all the input I needed was to review the idea of truth. It's a good reminder for me today; I hope it's helpful for you too!

Believe Him for Transformation

2009-12-18T11:11:00.001-06:00

As often happens, I got a gentle rebuke the other night when praying about believing God. As I've written about frequently, this is a key topic for me & my relationship with the Lord. In fact, it's hard for me to believe this isn't a key topic for all of us, whether we know it or not, but I will leave that deciding up to you!

I asked God what it was that I wasn't believing Him for lately. And His answer? Transformation.

Ah, what a good God. I forget sometimes, as I am looking at, examining and praying about my human and fallen tendencies that although I am an imperfect being in a fallen world, HE is a perfect God who has drawn us with cords of kindness. Through the sacrifice of Christ, I am not limited by an imperfect world, an imperfect will or anything else. He can make me different. He has already made me different, but that transformation doesn't have to ever stop. I need only to believe and submit to His direction. And I can be continually more and more freed from my natural tendencies and further freed to live into the beautiful creation He designed me to be!

The Grating of the Plane

2009-12-17T11:11:00.001-06:00

Do you know what a microplane grater is? If not, it may be helpful to quickly google an image for reference in this metaphor... :)

I've had this image in my head a lot lately, and it may sound sort of morose, but the image has been of a microplane grater rubbing against my skin - just grating away the layers. It may sound a little gory, but I think it's appropriate. If you've ever used one, you know that a microplane grater can definitely get the job done; little can be left of the outer layer of anything you rub it up against. At the same time, it's workmanship makes for removal of little bits at a time; even in its harsh task, it is somehow delicate as well.

I have seen God's had grating away the (metaphoric) flesh in my life in new ways lately, and while I truly am grateful for the refinement, I have to admit that sometimes it hurts! And in addition to some surface wounding, I've found that - in addition - there are some situations in which I also need to grieve a little bit for that which is being scraped away. Or, perhaps it isn't the flesh I'm mourning, but the assumptions of my fleshly self.

The less I attach to the things of my self, and the more I let the Father refine me, the more I realize how foolish it is to attach to my own best plans at all. My own best ways, my own best thoughts, my own best ideas...not a one measures up to His plans, His thoughts, His ways. I will lean not on my own understanding; His way is the path to my greatest good - without fail!

Looking to You

2009-12-16T11:11:00.001-06:00

"O our God, will You not judge them? For we are powerless before this great multitude who are coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are on You." 2 Chronicles 20:12-13 (NASB)

I know I am one among many as I hear this sentiment and my feel it resonate in my heart. There are definitely times when I feel powerless before a great multitude who come against me... a multitude of situations, scenarios, limitations, impulses, imperfections... the list could go on and on. I feel, sometimes, like there is a resistance on every side. And, yes, sometimes, I just feel like I have no earthly idea what to do.

But that's the point, isn't it? I have no earthly idea. So I, too, can come to the throne with this beautiful prayer. "I do not know what do to, but my eyes are on You!" Praise God for His righteous leading and His shepherding us! I would be so lost without Him!

On the Approach

2009-12-11T11:11:00.000-06:00

I have a book that's been sitting on my nightstand since last Christmas. I have wholeheartedly wanted to read it, and it's on a topic that is of great interest to me. Yet, I haven't; it's just been sitting there. For nearly a year.

I finally started reading it today, and as I fought the urge to put it down half way into the first chapter, I realized why it's taken me so long to start it in the first place: truth.

Proverbs 23:23 reads, "Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding." (NIV)

This is clear instruction, and intuitively, I nod along as I read. Of course! How could the truth not be a good thing? Wisdom, good. Discipline, good. Understanding, also good. I would be the first one to tell you that I believe in the pursuit of these things, and that that belief shows up in the activity and actions of my life.

Yet, sometimes, I resist.

I didn't pick up this book because I was a little afraid of what it might have to say. I am still a little afraid, to tell the truth. It's about relationships, Biblical relationships with others in our lives, and I am fairly certain it has some things to teach me. I'm only about 5 chapters in, and I already know there are some ways in which I'm not living out or living into a Biblical standard. Actually, I suppose I knew that before I even started reading. Yet, before beginning, I could claim simple ignorance. How could I be expected to live God's principles if I wasn't 100% clear on what they are? Well, that might sound nice, but isn't honest. Just as the verse above says, we are to get truth, get wisdom and discipline. It doesn't say, "It's a lucky break for people who accidentally happen upon wisdom." It says "get wisdom." Get it. The word used in translation here is clearly active, assertive, alive. This isn't a verse about dumb luck resulting in some wisdom and knowledge of truth; this is a verse about action.

So, I've started my book, and I am going to keep reading. In fact, somewhere inside me, I have a feeling that once I get going, I'm not going to be able to put this book down. There is a craving deep inside me for this knowledge; for knowledge and knowing. Of Him, of His ways. Fearing them, and fearing the learning is foolishness. So, I'm diving in! Wherever you may find yourself treading lightly around His direction, go forth boldly. You are safe in His ways!

More on Battles

2009-12-10T11:11:00.001-06:00

I wrote yesterday about remembering that the wars in our lives (which maybe are all just battles of a single war) are not really our battles. Instead, they below to the Lord, and He will fight for us (see also Exodus 14:14). So, just in case you needed any more convincing, please read and absorb this:

'You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the LORD on your behalf, O Judah and Jerusalem ' Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out to face them, for the LORD is with you." 2 Chronicles 20:17

And please, really do let that sink in. Even though I wrote this, I found myself thinking earlier today, "Wow, I need to take in that message! This is God's battle...and He will be victorious." In fact, He is already victorious. We just have to believe Him for it!

Any place there is worry or fear or doubt, turn it over to the Warrior protecting us all. We do not need to fight this battle. He is with us! Hallelujah!

Battle Owner

2009-12-09T11:11:00.002-06:00

I'll start here:

"Then in the midst of the assembly the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jahaziel the son of Zechariah, the son of Benaiah, the son of Jeiel, the son of Mattaniah, the Levite of the sons of Asaph; and he said, "Listen, all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem and King Jehoshaphat: thus says the LORD to you, 'Do not fear or be dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours but God's." 2 Chronicles 20:14-15 (NASB), emphasis mine

I added the bold formatting... "Do not fear or be dismayed...for the battle is not

yours but God's."

I cannot say enough how important this principle continues to be in my own life. When I feel like it's me against the world (or me against myself!), it is SO easy to be dismayed and frustrated and, yes, afraid. But when I remember this key principle, I find His peace. We are not alone, nor are we meant to be. He doesn't send us into our battles, our lives or our days alone. Believe Him for it!!

Worship & Praise

2009-12-08T11:11:00.001-06:00

Today, we use the phrase "praise and worship" as commonly as "In Jesus Name" and so many other phrases we all-too-casually throw out without the appropriate level of thought, reverence and consideration; it's just part of our "jargon."

Last night, however, a passage referencing both praise & worship caught my attention, and as I dug a little deeper, I found it to be worth sharing:

"Jehoshaphat bowed his head with his face to the ground, and all Judah and the inhabitants of Jerusalem fell down before the LORD, worshiping the LORD. The Levites, from the sons of the Kohathites and of the sons of the Korahites, stood up to praise the LORD God of Israel, with a very loud voice." 2 Chronicles 20:18-19 (NASB)

I noticed that the two words used here for "worshiping" (v. 18) and "praise" (v. 19) are two different words in the Hebrew. The word used for worship distinctly implies one laying prostrate on the ground, face down. As you may notice, there is a reference to some of the men then standing up...to praise. Well, this word translated as "praise" implies absolutely uninhibited shouting, vocal cheering and a large show altogether. This is NOT a shy moment!

What struck me was this question: for all the times I say that it's time for "praise & worship" (in whatever context!), in my life, how often do I either praise or worship in the sense of these words above and their original meaning? And certainly, another worthy question is how often do I do both??

For me, this was a good reminder not to forget the core of what those times are about - not only in act, but in spirit. Hope they serve as reminders and encouragement to you too. Don't forget that "all scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness" (2 Timothy 3:16, NIV)!

Day by Day

2009-12-04T11:11:00.000-06:00

When the Israelites wandered in the wilderness, they were provided manna in small, manageable, daily portions. When Paul took his missionary journeys through the various parts of the then-known world, his work was executed one city, one established community at a time. Even God Himself spread creation across a week's worth of days - creating each thing in succession, and then modeling for us all a day to rest.

By nature, I tend to try to do too much too fast sometimes. I decide to undertake a project or an internal change, and I find myself unwittingly surprised when my transformation hasn't been completed 15 minutes later.

I need to remember that life isn't lived that way - and it's no doubt for good reason. I could espouse all the positives of having to build a road, one pave stone at a time...but I will spare you the rhetoric. Instead, I will just say that this is the way God designed us.

I am certainly more successful and less overwhelmed when I let life, even my life, unfold at His pace. I can do today's work today...but tomorrow's portion remains in His hands. I'm sure we are all familiar with the verse, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34 (NIV)

In addition to being able to actually function better in the present day, I realize that when I don't hurry myself into tomorrow and tomorrow's tomorrow, I am better able to appreciate and recognize the beauty of the journey. There are many small wanders upon even the simplest of paths. I don't want to miss the way He's marked out for me, and staying on the path doesn't ensure I won't miss some of the scenery. Take it easy. This time of year that is especially hard, but in the long run, the intentionality begets ease and peace. He promises.

Priorities

2009-12-03T11:11:00.001-06:00

As we head into a busy time of the year for many, I have found myself in a particularly busy place in life. There is much we are planning and many decisions to be made and priorities to be set. Being who I am, I tend to get into "decision maker" mode a little too easily. I can get into a mindset where I am evaluating things left and right and making big decisions and big plans, all without ever checking in with God.

Talk through some of this stuff with my boyfriend last night, we were talking about the fact that, even with all the variable factors in play, we can stay strong and certain in our decisions if we stick to our top priority: staying submitted to God.

He sees every angle, every factor, every heart and every detail...and He (and He alone) knows what is truly in the best interest of His children - short term and long.

So, if we stay focused on the top priority of being under His will, we can rest absolutely in peace. We still have our parts to play - due diligence, seeking and making decisions in wisdom, but above all else, we have to let Him lead. He won't lead us astray. Guaranteed.

"May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen." Hebrews 13:20-21 (NIV), emphasis mine

Trust Him with You

2009-12-02T11:11:00.001-06:00

I have a friend who is having a hard time right now, and I can SO feel my fleshly desire to jump in and try to "help" the situation. I put help in quotation marks, because although my desire is to help, what's really going on is that I'm trying to control! There isn't a way for me to be helpful in this situation, except for to love my friend and to pray.

While my own discomfort with my friend's discomfort is palpable in the pit of my stomach, what the pit also tells me is that I am not trusting God with my friend. And if I'm going to be perfectly clear about the bottom line, it means that I'm simply not trusting God.

As hard as it is for me to live into, it's just plain truth that your life is mine to manage. There are a hundred ways in which my own life is not even mine to "manage!" So, what am I thinking when I let myself get bogged down in someone else's feelings? I'm thinking God won't take care of it. I'm thinking God won't take care of that person. In fact, unconsciously, I might be able to say I seem to be thinking that God doesn't care.

Remember, God LOVES us, and that's with a Biblical, active love. It's not a far-away-watching-from-the-clouds love. He is up in our business whether we like it or not - as long as we let Him be Lord of our lives. And when God gets involved, things get good. Sometimes they get uncomfortable, but tell me for half a second that you think Jesus' life was comfortable. In fact, think of anyone you admire, and tell me you think for a nano-second that their life was comfortable. Comfort is the enemy sometimes; I'm certain of it.

So, I have to let go of my own reservations about my friend's discomfort. I can love my friend through a hard time, but I shouldn't try to take it away. With God in charge (and in this situation, He is firmly in the driver's seat!), it can't go wrong! And maybe this discomfort will be the doorway to the best that is yet to come. I need to trust. One day at a time, I must! And I have to let Him help me - even with the trusting; I haven't found another way!

Appearances

2009-12-01T11:11:00.002-06:00

This weekend, I had a conversation with a good friend that got me thinking. Our sermon that night had been about the importance of relationships, and we were discussing the relevance of this topic around the holidays. This is a time of year during which so many feel especially struck with loneliness and sadness over the state of their own relationships...especially relationships with family.

I was reminded of times in my past, and of scenes from movies and the shared memories of friends - all scenes of happy loving relationships between friends, lovers and families. For many, these scenes can bring on waves of sadness. I would be lying if I were to say I've never looked at a scene out of someone else's life and thought, "Gosh, why not me?"

But, what I was reminded of during my conversation with my friend was that any family can look happy in church for an hour or so, any couple can put on a happy face in the middle of a dinner party and even friends sometimes have times where they "fake it." It's not pretty; it's not even good, but it's real.

So, what's my point?

The Bible talks about not coveting the things of others... that's sort of Sunday School 101, but I think it applies just as much - if not more so - for adults, and adult things...like relationships. God knows what He's doing. With each and every one of us; He knows, and He has a plan. And His plan is GOOD. Good like only He can do. Don't long for someone else's journey; each one has pain and hardship. And the journey you are on is being guided at every step of the way by the Maker who loves you more than you can know.

Progress

2009-11-30T11:11:00.001-06:00

I have to re-remind myself sometimes about the nature of progress. I find myself unconsciously thinking that life happens in a straight line. I seem to think that I will realize or recognize some issue in my life, put in a place a single, clear plan to address it and then that will be that.

What I then have to realize is that life doesn't usually work that way. Maybe if we lived in Eden, and there was still a need for growth & refinement, the process would be smooth. But, we live in a fallen world, and the thorns in our flesh don't always fall away without issue. Sometimes they do, and that's wonderful when it happens. But I need to remember to give myself grace and have patience for the process of change.

As metals are refined, the skimming of the dross is a slow, step by step process. When wood is whittled away to reveal the art underneath, as envisioned by the Maker, and when our hearts and lives and reshaped and changed, it takes time, and it takes process. The rushing water of the ocean takes years to smooth the stones into the works of art that reflect the beauty of the world around them, so I use these examples to remind us all that sometimes the crags and rough edges are just markers of a spot in a longer process. Trust Him for the journey, and we will get there right in time.

Cold War

2009-11-26T11:11:00.001-06:00

I had a meeting earlier this week that was a little tense to say the least. In fact, after most of the people had left the room, a friend who remained in the room looked at me and said, "Cold war. How long do you think that'll last?"

I sigh again just thinking about it.

I left that meeting feeling frustrated and a little disheartened. Then a new thought occurred to me: what can I do to thaw things out? Now, in general, I am definitely NOT in favor of inserting myself into situations that don't involve me, but this particular situation not only involves me, but officially (in a professional responsibility sense) is mine to help mediate.

So, I went back to my desk and sent off a quick note - thanking one of the people in the group for being frank, honest and up front. It's true that after her direct comments, there was an uncomfortable silence from some, but what she did was speak truthfully and without rancor.

I'm not sure my email will make much difference at all, but my hope was to do a tiny bit to ease the situation, and - more importantly - to actively and intentionally encourage honesty and direct communication. While that may all seem like a lot of uninteresting corporate musing, I am certain the principles are rooted in the Bible. And my take is that the Bible is as applicable at work as it is at home or in the church or anywhere else.

"Kings take pleasure in honest lips; they value a man who speaks the truth." Proverbs 16:3 (NIV)

"These are the things you are to do: Speak the truth to each other, and render true and sound judgment in your courts;" Zechariah 8:15 (NIV)

"In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16 (NIV)

I'm doing my best to take what I read in the Book of Truth and apply it to my life. It's not always going to be graceful, and it's sometimes might not even be done well or rightly, but I'm doing the best I can. And I think that's what we're called to do. So, one day at a time, let's do it!

You Are

2009-11-25T11:11:00.001-06:00

Our pastors at church are great at reminding us that 1) God is who He says He is and that 2) He does what He says He'll do. There is a third truth I want to focus on today: 3) You are who He says You are.

Yep, let me say that again: You are who HE says you are.

We all tend to be so hard on ourselves, and the phrase "negative self-talk" has become rather common in our self-help saturated world. There is a key, fundamental truth in the midst of all the coaching for self-positivity. Believing God's word means believing ALL of it, and it's been my own experience that some of the most difficult words to trust in are those He has about me, and I've seen the same struggle in so many others. But let's review just some of what He says about you & I.

First of all, and this is a "go to" for me when I am tempted to believe otherwise: I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14; fact check me.

I am God's treasured possession (Deuteronomy 7:6).

You are God's child. (John 1:12-13)

You are the apply of His eye (Psalm 17 & Zechariah 2:8).

We are loved with an everlasting love. We are LOVED. By God. Drink that in, friends. The everlasting love of the Father is yours. He loves you. (Jeremiah 31)

And He has chosen you. (Isaiah 41)

You are precious in God's sight. PRECIOUS. (Isaiah 43)

You are God's friend. (John 15:15)

He delights in you. I'm not going to give you the reference on that one; I challenge you to find it for yourself, and to dig into the Bible, it's His love letter to us all, and there is MUCH that He says about you. His truth isn't reserved for Him and what He says about the world, Himself or others. He's talking about you. He's talking about me. Will you believe?

Thankful for the Lies

2009-11-24T11:11:00.001-06:00

I found myself praying a strange prayer this morning. This last week has come with many attacks from the enemy; I've heard lies in my head, and have had to fight hard to remember that the truth lies in Christ, not in this fallen world and the words of the liar.

So, as I was reflecting on this and praying about it, I heard myself telling God that, as strange as it may seem, I was grateful - in a way - for the lies. Not only am I grateful for the ability to see the attacks for what they are, but also that I have the chance to fight against them. I've called on scripture, the power of the name of Jesus, and simply the love of God many times in the last week or so...and, of course, He never fails me.

More so, these challenges of deception have forced me to dig back into some basic truths as a reminder and as reinforcements. And in digging into these these, I've found myself rooted in God's strength. Furthermore, some of my feelings that have reared up in response to his teasing have really challenged me to look at the root causes. I've unearthed unknown and unsuspected pockets of pride, of fear and even rebellion...all in the last week! And as these impurities get brought up to the surface, I know the Refiner skims away the dross, and I am more able to shine my light for His glory. So, I found myself thinking about this scripture, and being thankful for this little span of trials.

"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience." James 1:2-3 (NKJV)

And more than gratitude for the trials, I find myself grateful for a God who works all things together for the good, for my good...and for your good. My challenge to myself, especially in this coming week, is to look upon ALL of it as good...not because Satan's lies are good, and not because the discomfort feels good...but because GOD is good, and I have the option to put it all in His caring and capable hands. With that perspective, there is little to see on the landscape without also being grateful for His hand at work!

Circumstances being what they are...

2009-11-23T11:11:00.000-06:00

I woke up today kinda out of sorts. I haven't had enough sleep the last few nights in a row, and that kind of pile up takes a toll on me. I had a headache, my eyes hurt and I was already running late for work by the time I woke up, so no time to workout. Not my personal favorite start to a day. So, I got up and started dragging myself through the morning routine.

Then, I was hit with a thought that I'm nearly certain came straight from God: it doesn't have to be this way.

No, I don't have the ability to magically catch up on sleep; nor can I shake this headache. However, God is good, and He is faithful, and when I zoom out just a tiny bit, I remember that He blesses me in incredible ways again and again and again. He's relentless in His love and in His favor. And I am so grateful.

So, I was reminded again that regardless of circumstance, I have the option of choosing to consider it all as joy and letting HIS truth be the truth of my day. Praise God! It'll change your life!

When You Are With Him

2009-11-20T11:11:00.001-06:00

I wrote about Asa yesterday, but this guy has some good stories, so here's another.

Background for this passage is simply that Asa was kind of "freaked out" about some opposition he was up against. Luckily, Azariah was there...

"The Spirit of God came upon Azariah son of Oded. He went out to meet Asa and said to him, 'Listen to me, Asa and all Judah and Benjamin. The Lord is with you when you are with him. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will forsake you. For a long time Israel was without the true God, without a priest to teach and without the law. But in their distress they turned to the Lord, the God of Israel, and sought him, and he was found by them.'" 2 Chronicles 15:1-4 (NIV)

The short version of the aftermath is that, upon hearing this, Asa's heart was encouraged, his resolution to believe God restored and he took courage and charged ahead.

There is much we can learn not only from Asa's example, but from Azariah's exhortation. The idea that when we seek God, we will find Him is repeated in many places in the Bible, and I can always use the reminder. I also appreciate the reality check in reference to Israel. I'm comforted by the reminder that my problems aren't the first problems ever to exist on the face of the earth; it's a perspective thing I guess. I remember that, over generations, Israel repeatedly turned from God, but each and every time they sought Him, He was found by them, and He proved Himself strong on their behalf. It's hard for even me to convince myself He won't show up for me.

My favorite sentence in Azariah's encouragement is this: "The Lord is with you when you are with him." People talk about "finding God" all the time, and I've often heard it said in response that "God wasn't lost!" There's truth in the sentiment of that humor though. God doesn't stray from me; but I do stray from Him. He is always with me; it just doesn't seem like it sometimes, because I forget that I am with Him.

I just have to remember that our God is a loving, ever-present Father and that His heart is ALWAYS on me. And all it takes to feel that reality is to make an effort to be with Him. And He is with me. Always. Forever. This truth may seem cliche, and certainly may seem like old news to some, but when I stop and consider the magnitude of a loving Father whose perfect love shields me always, prefers me always and is always focused on me, I feel waves of gratitude anew. We serve an amazing King!

We are You

2009-11-19T11:11:00.001-06:00

A tiny tidbit caught my attention the other night... Look at Asa's prayer below:

"Then Asa called to the Lord his God and said, 'Lord, there is no one like you to help the powerless against the mighty. Help us, O Lord our God, for we rely on you, and in your name we have come against this vast army. O Lord, you are our God; do not let man prevail against you.'" 2 Chronicles 14:11 (NIV)

It was the tiny pronoun in the last sentence that struck me. Asa calls on God and asks for his help in battle and in strength. And yet, his last request comes just a breath after declaring his devotion to the Lord. And after affirming His commitment to God, he asks, "let no man prevail against you."

When I first read this, I thought that, perhaps, the idea was "Hey, God, you are going to help us, so don't fail and make yourself look bad." BUT, I think there's more to it than that. I see it this way: Asa's commitment to the Lord is his declaration of unity with God and with His purposes. Is it not true that our metaphor for our own relationship to Christ is marriage? And does the Bible not make it perfectly clear that, in marriage, we are joined as one in unity? With those things in mind, I believe Asa is saying, "You are our God, and we are Yours. We hitch ourselves to you!" In other words, we are one with You.

His next request, then, is not only perfectly logical, but also lovely in its commitment to their unity with God: "Let no man prevail against you." I read this to say, "If we fail, You fail." This isn't said because Asa expects God to fail; quite the opposite. I think Asa is just emphasizing their commitment to the Lord - tying his heart, his army & his success to Him.

Of course, I cannot know Asa's true intent, and this is all conjecture...but I love the example. I am Him, and that helps me believe, just a little bit more, that He is for me, and will never let me fall!

Rewards

2009-11-18T11:11:00.001-06:00

Let's start with the good stuff:

"O LORD, by your hand save me from such men, from men of this world whose reward is in this life. You still the hunger of those you cherish; their sons have plenty, and they store up wealth for their children. And I—in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness." Psalm 17:14-15 (NIV)

The phrase "such men" is referring to those elaborated more in the preceding verses, but basically it's "bad guys." The Psalmist is decrying their evil just words before this passage. Then, he throws in this beauty.

There are a couple things that catch my attention & admiration:

First, notice that the "such men", our evil-doers are also referred to as people "whose reward is in this life." It's almost thrown in as an after thought, and certainly is a passing descriptor, but let's think about the significance! If this word tells us that there are those whose reward is in this life, it's logical to say that the "other" group of people are those whose reward is in another life. Oh friends, don't you want to be those whose reward is not limited to the natural world?!?

Secondly, I loved the translation that reads "You still the hunger." That's beautiful to me, and such an apt metaphor. The Lord does fill my hungry places, but He stills them as well. Flutters of anxiety and fear are still when I let Him touch those places inside me. And, like the Psalmist I will strive to submit my hear to Him so that I can see His face in righteousness and find satisfaction in His likeness!

How grateful I am today for the scripture! They feed us again and again and then more!

Falling Down

2009-11-17T11:11:00.001-06:00

I had a little fall recently...well, the fall was little, but the aftermath wasn't quite. I slipped on my stairs and ended up cutting myself on a baby gate I use for my dogs. The cut ended up being long and deep and right through an arterial vein. I will spare you all the gory details, but the bottom line is, it wasn't good. After a day and a half in the hospital (which can only be partially blamed for my absence from writing; I apologize for that!), I came home to recover.

The good news was that I wasn't home alone. My boyfriend was over hanging out, and it was a good thing! I lost a lot a blood and he was there to drive me to the ER, get me situated once there and also to just take care of me in a million ways over the next few days.

A couple days later, he came across this verse in his reading:

"If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble." Ecclesiastes 4:10 (NLT)

He actually thought this was quite funny, and sent it to me in a text message - claiming it was "my" verse for this season. I have to admit I also thought it was funny, but of course, we both agreed that there is more in this scripture than just an opportunity to tease me about falling. :)

Let's put it in context; this passage is verses 9-12. The NLT has "The Advantages of Companionship" as the heading for this paragraph:

"Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken."

Of course, I am certain I am not alone in having heard this passage before - many times. Yet, I am struck anew by its relevance and its message as I think about the happenings of my own fall. In this particular example, my stumble was literal, and I am struck with a new appreciation for my companion that night. He didn't leave my bedside - literally, and he reached out to help me when I needed it. I am struck as I write with a wave of gratitude for not only him, but also for the others in my life whose hand is always within reach when I find myself on the ground.

As Thanksgiving approaches, I'm not going to buck tradition, but instead embrace it. I'm giving thanks today for companions whose hands are outstretched, and who stand with me when I have a battle to fight. And with God's powerful love woven amidst our fellows in Christ, what is there for us to fear?

For Me

2009-11-06T11:11:00.001-06:00

Remember this: The Lord is FOR YOU. (Psalm 56:9)

There is much cause for celebration even in just letting that truth simmer and settle into your heart.

"Give your burdens to the Lord,

and he will take care of you.

He will not permit the godly to slip and fall." Psalm 55:22 (NLT)

He loves us with a pure & true love. His love is active and ever-present. I had a VERY godly woman chide me the other day for saying, "I worry about...."

"Never worry," she said. "Worry is sin."

She's right of course; that's Bible. Worry is sin. Trust in Him. I am trusting in Him. I know that He is for me. He is taking care of me - right now. There is much cause for praise! He will NOT permit me to slip & fall. Thank You, Father!!!

Squirming

2009-11-05T11:11:00.001-06:00

I was engaged in some heavy-duty conversation last night, and a dear friend of mine was lamenting the challenges of making relationships really work. We were discussing the hard work of being fully honest, vulnerability and speaking up at times and in ways that are frightening or intimidating. It has been my experience, in any case, that the most worthwhile relationships in my life have also taken some of the largest doses of courage and strength.

My friend made an off-handed, only half-serious comment, the basic gist of which was, "Well, maybe we're not meant to be in those relationships - you know, the ones where it's hard." My friend wasn't serious, but I did have to smile. "My theory," I said, "is that a certain degree of challenge in my fulfilling relationships is simply a sign that God loves me."

My friend looked at me strangely (you might be looking at your computer with much the same facial expression!).

"As I see it," I said, "the relationships that take the most from us - when they're relationships that are worthy of the energy - also happen to be those that grow and develop us the most."

I use the qualifier about relationships that are worthy of the energy, because I know I'm not the only one who's willfully delved into relationships that were not in God's will for me...relationships that shirked His instructions and (I thought) fulfilled my own plans and desires. That type of relationship has also been hard. But, for me, it's a different type of difficult. The pain and aggravation of one of these self-propelled relationships was often caused by the existence of the relationship itself, and were largely in response to ungodly behavior or circumstances by one party or the other (yes, sometimes that "ungodly" person was me!). In these relationships, I found my heard wrenching again and again.

By contrast, rather than feeling like I've been wrenched in some way, healthy relationships in which I choose to really "dig deep" and show up usually leave me feeling like I'm squirming a bit. There's discomfort, yes. And some truth and honesty is painful in its own way...but, even with all that being true, there is a release in all of it. And the journey bears its own price again and again. That type of honesty and intention leads to a greater understanding of God, a truer commitment to Christ's ideals and a greater ability, for me, to lay down my self and seek after Him.

So, I guess my summary here is that, at least in my experience, wrenching is not good. But squirming just shows I'm living into God's will. Many great Bible teachers have spoken at length about the need to push past our comfort zones. A great pastor at my church recently remarked that our comfort zones "aren't places we were meant to live; they're places we're meant to rest." And I know Beth Moore has said that, if you're not being stretched into some sort of discomfort in your relationships, you're living in a world that is too small. Jesus stretched. Ah, I could probably write days on that alone. Can you imagine? Do you think Jesus' days were comfortable in almost any way? Thanks to the grace of our Father, His resolve was able to remain firm. Yet, I suspect, He probably had days where even He wanted to squirm a bit too...

Truth Telling

2009-11-04T11:11:00.001-06:00

I'm fairly certain that no one reading this post would disagree with me in saying that honesty is of the utmost importance to God. I wonder if I might lose a few of you if I modify my statement to say that "Absolute honesty is of the utmost importance to God."

I wonder how many of you might start considering the true definition of absolute honesty, as I have been lately.

The Bible tells us that the truth will set us free (John 8:32). It also encourages its reader, over and over again, to be truthful and to reject falsehoods (Ephesians 4:25, Proverbs 30:8, etc). Furthermore, there is Biblical example after example of the Godly pursuit of speaking truth. In many instances, truth is also closely connected with love...it might not be too far a stretch to say that love cannot exist without truth, nor truth without some form of love.

Along these same lines, there is this phrase we use that has been bothering me lately "Spare me the details" or "I spared him/her the full story." To "spare" someone seems to imply that the speaker is doing that person a favor; yet, the context of these statements often is within the cloak of opting out of a full truth. How much love can there be when half truths are spoken? Or partial truths omitted? Or raw truth avoided? What is left with absolute truth is shied away from?

I have been thinking a lot about this topic lately, and I suspect some of you are nodding along as you read. I don't think it would be hard to find people willing to join in my rally cry for "Truth!" Yet, I see the hypocrisy when I look at my own life. How many times have I avoided answering a question, because I didn't want to give my full, most truthful answer? How many times have I hoped to dodge a particular topic, because of hesitation about sharing the truthful account of my experience with a certain person or topic?

And yet, at the same time, would I not tell any child that a partial truth is not the truth at all?

I'm still considering this topic, and I invite you to do the same. I wonder what my life would look like, and in what areas there would be change, if I committed absolutely to rigorous honesty without exception. It's important to speak the truth with love, yes...but to continue to speak the truth nonetheless. Agree?

Permissive

2009-11-03T11:11:00.000-06:00

Our pastor recently challenged us all to begin earnestly praying Psalm 139:23&24:

"Search me, O God, and know my heart;

test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends you,

and lead me along the path of everlasting life." (NLT)

As he pointed out, verse 24 is really where the rubber meets the road. "Point out anything in me that offends you..."

Well, I have been praying this prayer, and I have to say I was not anticipating the things that God has been pointing out to me. So far, He's shown me a couple key areas in which I need to do some work. However, both of these areas elicited, from me, a surprising response. When the Lord said, "Hey, look at this," my heart's instant reaction was "Yeah, I know." Yikes!

I had expected (hoped?) that He would reveal things to me that were surprising areas - new frontiers just opening up before me. Instead, I realized, He was pointing out areas that offended Him, and they happened to also be areas where I knew I had some work to do.

God didn't say, "Hey, look at the ways in which you judge others" only for me to respond with, "What? I didn't know I did judge anyone!" Instead, my honest, unfiltered response was "Yeah, I know...I do that a lot, don't I?"

So, what I'm realizing is that - in addition to God pointing out these specific areas, He's also calling into question a bigger offense: my own permissiveness with my sin.

I've said, "Well, yeah, I do judge people sometimes, but pretty much only strangers. It's not like they're my friends or family." YIKES.

I'm just being honest here...but the truth is, I do have areas in which I sort of "let things slide." It's not like I pause and make a reasoned, rational decision. I don't think, "Well, I am pretty sure a little sin is no big deal." If I thought it through that much, I'd respond to my own conviction. Instead, these are areas - some of which may seem "minor" - that I sort of see slide past the radar as they happen. I just don't let them sit on the radar long enough to set off any warning bells.

So, as I continue to pray Psalm 139:23 & 24, I encourage you to do the same. I also encourage you to scour your life for areas in which you may have your own permissiveness showing up. Perhaps you will not find any, and I pray that is the case! But, for me, there are a few things that I know it's time to work on. So, here I go!

Representation

2009-11-02T11:11:00.000-06:00

I've been thinking a lot lately about the idea of representation. Many have surely heard it said that part of our job, here on earth, is to represent God to those around us. Hopefully you've all heard the saying that "You may be the only Bible someone ever reads" or "You may be the only Jesus someone gets to meet." The idea behind these phrases, of course, is that YOU carry the message of Christ, in all you do, in all you say.

The Bible tells us that we are surrounded by a "great cloud of witnesses" (see Heb 12:1). These witnesses are perhaps meant to be the angelic host, perhaps there is more to it. I am not certain. What I am sure about, though, is that the people in our lives see us. There are children in our world, coworkers in our days, neighbors on our streets and family at our holidays. And when they see you - even out of the corner of their eyes - they are taking in parts of the story of who you are.

It took me a couple years to be ready to put a Christian symbol on my car after committing my life to Jesus. I wanted to make sure I could be a consistently gracious driver before I went around advertising myself as a believer. And if that thought strikes you as unpleasant - that a "Jesus fish" or bumper sticker or other identifier is equivalent to "advertising yourself as a believer," then please remember that people do notice. And whatever your motivation may be for your cross necklace, Christian bumper sticker or sloganed T-shirt, it's the non-believer that you encounter who is your primary audience. It is to him or her that you are representing Jesus. Think...every day you climb into your car, little Jesus fish on the back, you take on the mantle of emissary for the Lord. And each time you talk about going to church, all in hearing distance become the mission field...

My heart's desire is to be someone that others see and think, "She's different. I wonder what it is." But, God, I ask you would NEVER let it be that others would see me and, on any level, think "Gosh, I thought she was a Christian."

None of us are perfect, and I am not the only one who will fall short of the ideal from time to time. But, when I remember that the word "represent" really is re-presenting Jesus to those around me, I remember the weight of the responsibility of being His. There is a whole cloud of witnesses who see me with spiritual eyes; yet the audience here in my daily life is no less important.

Testimony, part 2

2009-10-27T11:11:00.001-05:00

As I wrote about for yesterday's post, I have written - and am soon going to be sharing - my testimony. I have been excited about the opportunity, and had even invited a few close friends to join me. Then, this weekend, the Lord put some things on my heart... He seemed to be instructing me to cast a wider net and invite more people to come and hear.

I will admit that I really resisted this directive. I found myself talking to my boyfriend and saying that, while I wanted to bring glory to God, it was after all, my story, and I felt sensitive about who would hear it. Ugh. As soon as the words were on my lips, I knew that I was quite mistaken. This story, this listing of miracles and transformations in my internal and outward lives is far, far from my story. This is HIS story. That's the only way it could have turned out as it has...and this is just the beginning.

So, while I knew what I was going to do (be bold!), I looked at scripture for some additional guidance and support. I found this:

"But as for me, it is good to be near God.

I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;

I will tell of all your deeds." Psalm 73:28 (NIV)

and this...

"Sing praises to the LORD, enthroned in Zion;

proclaim among the nations what he has done." Psalm 9:11 (NIV)

and this...

"Come and listen, all you who fear God;

let me tell you what he has done for me." Psalm 66:16 (NIV)

and this....

"Sing to the LORD, for he has done glorious things;

let this be known to all the world." Isaiah 12:5 (NIV)

and, lastly, this...

"We will not hide them from their children;

we will tell the next generation
the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD,

his power, and the wonders he has done." Psalm 78:4 (NIV)

Needless to say, I found myself persuaded. And then, as if God wanted to just hit it home, after I'd already made my decision, one of our pastors at church shared this scripture with us this weekend:

"Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name;

make known among the nations what he has done." 1 Chronicle 16:8 (NIV)

Okay, okay, I get it! Not only did I need to be bolder about inviting people, but I needed to be quick to obey. So, I have.

And although you may not have a public speaking opportunity, I encourage you to let the principles here sink in and apply them in your own life. I've been praying for boldness with my coworkers; I'm sure this open invitation is part of His plan to teach me. I'm scared, but I know it is worth it! He has done amazing things...and I don't want to be shy about bringing glory to His name! Do you?

Testimony, part 1

2009-10-26T11:11:00.001-05:00

I had recently been given the opportunity to share the story of Jesus' work in me (so far!) this week at a recovery group at my church... it's a discipleship program of sorts, and I went through one of its intensive programs earlier this year. It's a ministry in which I'm still involved, and there is an open door for people to share their testimonies.

As I started pondering the opportunity, I knew I wanted to share. I started the writing process and found it to be both instructional and enriching. It was hard to dig into some of the darker parts of my life, and even more challenging to figure out how to encapsulate them in a way that would make sharing them both simple and useful. It wasn't easy.

Delving into so much of my history felt scary and frustrating. I found myself resisting. Then I remembered this principle:

"But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you." 1 Samuel 12:24 (NIV)

The "principle" in this verse that I'm referring to is that of appreciating the good. If there weren't harder seasons in my life, I wouldn't know to appreciate and love the great and happy place to which He's brought me. The hard parts of my story have given Him opportunities to show up and and show off...and I can, indeed, say that He has done great things!

So, testimony is written and I am grateful! Reflect today on not only His goodness, but the good acts He has done in your life and heart. It brings glory to Him and is Biblically commanded!

Example

2009-10-23T11:11:00.001-05:00

I was praying this morning, and had a brief moment that I felt was significant and wanted to share.

I was praying about what it means to be in leadership - at work, in ministry, and even in various relationships in my life. I was reflecting on what it really means to be in a position where others are looking up to me.

There are children in my life that look to me and whom I love dearly; I take seriously the responsibility of modeling appropriate behavior and boundaries for them. There are teenagers in my life, and I want them to see, in my example, ways they can resolve conflict and approach their own inner-growth process with dignity, faith and joy. I have employees that need to see me committing my efforts fully in my pursuits at work - and that the efforts are about being a person of character, not an employee seeking glory. And I serve in various ministries, and regardless of the context, I want those around me to look to me and see faithful humility, a countenance of graceful joy and the evidence of the fruit of the Spirit within me. And I have a man I love that I experiences an abundance of love, patience, understanding, adoration, grace and sacrificial giving in our relationship.

As I was praying, and considering all these various "roles," I heard myself say that being an example was "a great burden." I immediately retracted the words. My heart knew in that moment that I was wrong. It's a responsibility, yes, to be an example of the Lord's heart, to represent Him here on earth. Trust me, that "great cloud of witnesses" is often on my mind, and I wish I gave them less opportunity for what must be a host of holy sighs! I have many areas where my grade-card would probably read "Improvement needed." But my oh my, I am glad there isn't a spiritual grade-card. I give thanks for a God who never writes my sins in His book, now that I live in the well of His forgiveness and grace!

What I knew in that moment this morning was that the responsibility of being His representative wasn't a burden; I carry only the burdens I refuse to rest on His shoulders. Rather, it's a privilege. It is a privilege to be able to walk into my life and know that I can carry through even the most frustrating of days at work with a countenance of joy...not because I am so cheery and chipper, but because the King of Kings has sent His Spirit to me. It's an honor to be able to set down my own willfulness in deference to taking care of someone I love...again, not because I'm just this gracious and meek soul, but because He who is in me, is greater than he who is in the world. It IS the world and the enemy's hold in the world, in my world, that drive me toward selfishness, surliness and bitter resentment. Yet, it is the Lord who loves me that enables me to do all things. And that includes walking into every day in a way that speaks to those around me - all around me. In service or in leadership, yes...but also as I wait in line for groceries or lean against the car while pumping gas, I pray and ask that I would be one of those people that others would look at and think, "She's got something different inside her." I pray that they might ask, "What is it?" And, Lord, I pray for the boldness to be able to proclaim Your goodness without hesitation and with grace!

It isn't a burden to have these things on my mind; the consideration of them isn't heavy. The work is the Lord's to do. He renews minds. He transforms hearts. He fills and guides and directs. I need to only ask and receive. I have to be active in both parts, but He is faithful in deed!

I will live into the privilege and honor of calling You mine, Lord! Thank You for Your blessings!

God is Love

2009-10-20T11:11:00.001-05:00

One of the most well-known pieces of scripture is probably a portion of 1 John 4:8 which reads, "God is love." The entire verse (below) is one I decided to focus on for today.

"Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love." (ESV)

I have a lot of different senses about what this means, but I wanted to dig into the original language to make sure I wasn't missing any richness provided with the original writing.

First, let's check the verb. The "is" in this sentence is in a verb tense called present indicative active. Really, if you don't let it intimidate you, the name of the tense itself pretty much says it all. It's present. Current. It's also active. This is a thing that is happening, currently. It's right now real & true. It indicates a prolonged state. God is love. Ahh, let that soak in a little...

The combination and grammatical structure of the entire phrase is also important and can teach us more about its meaning. The combination of the word for love with the structure of the sentence indicates that the statement is describing a quality of a thing; that is to say, God is described by love. Love, which is usually a "thing" or noun for us, is also a descriptive quality that helps comment on God...and, especially within this context, the reverse is true. God comments on what love is as well.

Lastly, the word for love found here is one many will know. It's probably the first Greek word I ever learned, and I bet I'm not alone in that. Agape (uh-gawp'-ay). One fact I think really helps explain this word at its root is that the word is sometimes translated to mean, essentially, "love feast." This is a word that describes an abundance and overflow of deep down, right to the core essential love. This word (and its root) are used to describe the way God feels towards Jesus, and describe the essential quality of what it means to be a Christian. Agape love is self-sacrificing, generous and abundant. And this, as we are learning, is what God is.

"Strong Belief"

2009-10-14T11:11:00.001-05:00

I had a friend at work ask me some questions the other day. He stared with acknowledging that he knew I had "strong beliefs." This phrase got me thinking...

What is a "strong" belief? Is there such a thing?

I took what he said to indicate that, really, I had things I believed (in my head) that I also put action to (outwardly) in my life. And I started wondering about whether or not I can claim to really "believe" something if I'm not living it out in my life.

So, let me make this a little more concrete. Here's an example:

I believe the Bible to be absolute truth, accurately reflecting things God wishes to communicate to His people (including me!).

I believe that the Bible indicates clearly that I am to tithe the first 10% of my income.

I believe this is one of God's directions to me.

I believe that being obedient to God's will - without exception - is in my own best interest.

So, could I claim to believe these things and then fail to faithfully tithe my first 10%?

Only if I want what is not best for me. Right?

In my opinion, if I were to not tithe, I would, essentially, be saying that I don't believe one of the things above. My guess is that, in a moment of short-term vision, I might think that hanging onto the money I earned is in my "best interest" at any given point in time. That would be understandable to me. However, how can I claim that and also claim to believe that obedience to God is in my best interest?

I hope I haven't completely confused everyone reading. My point is this. I think it's fair to say that I either believe or do not believe that something is right or true. If I believe it, my actions would reflect that. If I do not, I think there must be somewhere inside me that I do not believe. I think it's fair to say that believing is sort of an all-or-nothing deal. Fair? I can't "sort of" believe that the sky is blue. I either do or do not believe it. I can doubt my own believe, but I still have to land on one side of the fence.

My point, in terms of "Why do I care?" is this: if I believe God's commands are for my best good, then I should follow them. All of them. Not just the ones that suit me for a given day or moment. Now, just to be completely clear, I fall short of this ideal all the time... but when I do, I repent - by changing my mind (coming into belief on that subject) AND changing my actions. And I pray consistently for God to expose to me new areas in which I need this kind of change.

So, I would put to each of us...if there is an area of repetitive transgression in your life (in my life), what is it that I do not believe? And when I identify that, am I okay claiming to NOT believe it? If not, something has to change. The two things can't coexist without denial.

Sometimes, for me, this kind of topic gets a little too heady, but often times, the other thing that can happen is that it takes all the nuance and guess-work out of things that really, in truth, are quite simple. Much of the world is not "black and white," but much of it is. I think danger lies in mis-identification on that front. So, call a spade a spade... where, I ask myself, does that leave me?

Patience & Patience

2009-10-08T11:11:00.001-05:00

There are two root Greek words that are translated as "patience" in most versions of the Bible. The first is makrothymia. This is the word often translated as "long-suffering." And that's sort of what it means. This is the word that I think of when I am feeling tempted to lose my temper. When in the midst of a frustrating conversation or upsetting situation, I must display makrothymia in order to maintain my composure. This word is about self-restraint and maintaining balance and calm in light of provocation. In fact, the very literal translation of this word is "long temper."

The second word is a personal favorite of mine: hypomone'. For me and my individual personality, I seem have an easier time displaying makrothymia; hypomone', however, is where the rubber meets the road. The literal translation of this word means "to abide under." This word is more frequently and consistently translated as "patience," although, in my opinion, we don't have an English word that represents its full meaning well. Hypomone' is about endurance. This is the thing that comes to mind when I find myself in the midst of a painful season or long-standing situation. In this situations, when I submit to God's sovereignty and authority, I am displaying hypomone'. When I am in a time of teaching or feel myself in the midst of the "refiner's fire," chances are, the quality I need to find within is hypomone', if I am going to carry myself with grace and without angst. One word-study aid translates this word as "patience continuance."

It is also a variant of hypomone' that the Bible uses when talking about patience more specifically in the sense that indicates waiting. For me, this adds an interesting element to the idea of waiting - or, more specifically, waiting on the Lord. Although I'm sure the Greek includes more nuance than this, the quick version as I understand it is that makrothymia is about staying peaceful in the moment, while hypomone' is about enduring challenges with peace and gracefulness. For me, hypomone' is what I must find in the Spirit while my own flesh has a tendency to be indignant, self-seeking, impatient and even self-righteous. I must rely on the empowerment of the Holy Spirit to come to (and remain in!) a place of submission, surrender and acceptance. This world, as I frequently continue to find, is about God's plans. God's timing is sovereign. God's pace (although sometimes frustrating!) IS the best pace. God's methods of honing and growing and teaching us are sometimes painful and frustrating, but they are for our greatest good - without exception. Remembering that, I believe, will help us all stay focused on letting the Spirit bring abundances of both makrothymia and hupomone' into our hearts and lives.

Encouragement

2009-10-07T11:11:00.002-05:00

In principle, I'm not a fan of randomly plucking a verse from scripture and crafting a "point" around it for my own purposes. If I am learning anything as I grow in my study of the word, it's that "Context is king!" (thanks, Pastor Tom!)

That said, I do want to throw out a verse that, although part of a more specific context for the original writing and reception, does have general application in our lives as believers today.

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)

Sometimes it's easy for me to get bogged down in the pressures of life, or to be discouraged by either failures or the simple frequency with which the world around me (or within me!) doesn't live up to my expectations. It happens. In fact, in some seasons, it happens a lot.

I am learning to appreciate anew, however, the difference a little encouragement can make. And, like many other acts of service, I find that I am even more encouraged when I take the time to thoughtfully encourage another.

I have a new accountability partner, and she & I are sharing emails back and forth each day about some of our own personal goals of growth and development for ourselves. Earlier today, I set aside just a few moments to be truly thoughtful about response to her. After reading her email and being sensitive to the nudging of the Spirit, I felt like I needed to put a little more thought and pause into my email to her than I might on a normal day.

And I am so glad I did! She probably hasn't even read the email yet, but I am feeling great! :)

My sincere hope, of course, is that she finds my words to be encouraging and uplifting. I hope she feels a bit lighter and even more hopeful as a result. But, the bonus outcome that I wasn't expecting was that I feel better too! By taking the time to encourage her in truth, I was reminding myself of those same truths! And it serves to further reinforce my faith that God is faithful, and that He does work all things together for the good of those who are called according to His purpose! (see Romans 8:28)

So, I encourage each of you to take the time today, with a spirit of service, to truly speak to someone's heart around you and do your best to encourage them. Don't worry about whether or not you say the "right" thing, and definitely don't worry about the outcome! Those things are in God's hands. Just show up and do the best you can; then believe Him for His purposes in it. And then, sit back and give thanks to Him for the encouragement your own heart is guaranteed to feel!

I marvel again and again at the way our Lord designed us... we are blessed to be a blessing, yes... but to also be blessed by our own acts of service? Well, it's flawless design! I'm sure of that!

Jackpot

2009-10-06T11:11:00.001-05:00

I have the incredible good fortune to be a part of a church that has started its own Bible College. Our instructor is passionate, knowledgeable and filled with the Holy Spirit. He's a gifted and open teacher, and like a cherry on top, we also happen to have a lot of fun.

After class last night, I was thinking about what an incredible blessing it is for us to have the privilege of this situation in so many ways. Not only is it nearby and affordable, it's quality teaching in a collegial environment. It's at my church and the room is full of people who love the Lord and whom I have the privilege of getting to see every week in services, serving God and worshipping His holy name.

There are religions - Christian religious traditions - that fail to teach that, through Christ, we now all have access to the truth of His word and to His heart. There are people in my very city who don't think they're supposed to pick up their Bibles and learn it! A little more removed, there are people who struggle to afford a Bible; they don't hop on to the BibleGateway website to check various translations. There are people in other nations who walk miles to get to church, and those who not only meet in secret, but are literally martyred for their faith. And I throw on sweats on a Monday night and drive over to our cozy meeting room to learn about the word with 70-some of my classmates. Incredible.

Today, as simple as it is, I'm just taking time to be grateful for my exposure and ability to access not only the Lord Himself, but quality tools that can help me get to know Him more. I hold firmly to the belief that prayer and time are the key tools, and even those living in remote lands who don't have a Bible in their language can get to know God that way. But I am really grateful that the depth of information to which I have access is right in front of me and freely accessible in many ways.

In one of my classes, our instructor made the comment that prosperity often breeds ingratitude. I want to set aside today as a special day for me to honor the prosperity He's given me (and many of us, I trust) in regard to the opportunity to really learn and know His word and teachings. Thank You, Father!

Deserving

2009-10-05T11:11:00.002-05:00

I had a good and humbling reminder recently...a reminder of the true magnitude of God's grace.

I'd made a mistake in a certain area of my life, and was feeling really frustrated and disappointed in myself. I had sinned in this area before, and had been doing really well in living in victory, and holding myself to higher standards...standards that I believe are reflective of His standards for me in this particular area.

Anyway, I messed up and was feeling pretty flat-on-my-face in my sin. I was worshipping and spending some time with God, and just feeling so down on myself. I was aware of my guilty feelings, and wrestling through with God whether or not it was appropriate to feel the guilt. I know there is "no condemnation for those who are in Christ" (see Romans 8:1), and yet I definitely did not want to sweep my sin under the run, throw out a cursory repentance prayer and move on. So, I sat with it a little and spent time with God, talking it out.

I heard myself saying, from a sincere spot in my heart, that I just felt like I didn't deserve God's grace on this one...I was saying that I "know better" and had acted immaturely. "I just don't deserve You," I heard myself say. That's when God gave me the much-needed reminder. His response, as gentle as it could be, was "You never have."

Well that got my attention for sure. "Lord?"

"What's changed?" He asked.

*deep exhale*

Right.

That's right.

I have never deserved the magnanimity of God. I have never been worthy of the gift of His Son on the Cross. I never have and NEVER will have earned Calvary. Never. I am incapable of it.

This reminder not only corrected my lack of humility, but more so, drew me closer to the heart of God. His reminder to me wasn't shaming or condemning - even of my arrogance. Instead, it was just a reminder of the reality of truth.

Romans 5:8 says, "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (NIV)

And that's it in a nutshell. The grace He lavishes on me (even when I make the same mistake more than once!) and the forgiveness He extends are demonstrations of His love. Christ went to the cross while you & I still bore the weight of our guilt, so that we would never have to again. He defeated the condemnation I was allowing to be heaped on my own head, and I am thankful He re-directed me and reminded me to take hold of the freedom He's given.

I don't think there's anything wrong with letting my own disappointment in my weakness have a moment to be experienced, but when I wallow in it, or worse, lend the idea of truth to it, I negate the reality of His sacrifice and what it really means. I was blessed by my own fallen-nature, in a roundabout way. Just another example of God working all things together for good (Romans 8:28). I not only got to learn a renewed appreciation for His grace, but I came to love His heart just that much more...for He loves us. And that is the hinge on which our lives turn. What a gift; what a Lord!

Base-Line Believing

2009-10-02T11:11:00.001-05:00

Many of us are familiar with Philippians 4:13; the NKJV reads "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Well, I dug into this verse a little deeper today. And before I reveal what I've found, I want to tell you why I looked in the first place.

I've never thought of myself as one of those "special" people who goes out and boldly tells about the essence of Christianity. In fact, I've really thought of myself, many times, as someone whose primary opportunity to witness is in living my daily life in front of those around me. I think Jesus has spent the last couple years teaching me more in-depth lessons about living Christianity out (VERY imperfectly) and being a leader in the faith through my example. In that way that I think many of us have, I tend to limit God sometimes. In this particular scenario, I think I've been unintentionally putting limits on Him in my mind by assuming that it would end there.

Seems that I might be wrong. And, actually, regardless of what He has planned in specific situations and relationships, the verse I'm reviewing today assures me I am quite wrong. And it's one of those days and ways in which I'm really glad I was wrong.

So, let's look at the Amplified translation of this verse; in digging into the root words, the AMP sometimes captures "essence" so well for my brain, it makes me grin. Here's one of those instances:

"I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency]." Philippians 4:13 (AMP)

As I look at that, I am struck by a convicting question: what thing could I possibly label as just one of those things for which I am not equipped? Yes, surely, there are actions, activities and plans that God has set aside for someone other than me. But someone who cannot? Read what it says there. Ready for anything. Equal to anything. And my favorite part? "Self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency."

If you have ever found yourself (as I have) believing that you just can't know the right way, or just cannot say the right thing or take the best action, you are wrong. If you find yourself believing that you're just not "cut out for" something, please consider that that might simply be a nice way of saying that you don't believe yourself to be equal to the task. If you allow Christ to infuse inner strength into you, are are ready for anything. How different could the rest of today be if you lived with that belief foremost in your mind? Let's find out, shall we?

Participation

2009-10-01T11:11:00.001-05:00

So, my brother had a back injury that has him now flat on his back and in severe pain with repetitive spasms. Poor kid. He lives alone, and needs help to roll even onto his side. I'm not sure of where he's at in regards to a saving faith, but I know his relationship with Jesus is far from a priority in his life.

Today, I took him lunch & some additional ice packs. Tonight, I spent a couple hours hanging out, helping with little things, made dinner & brought him a prescription. Tomorrow morning, we're going to figure out how to lay him down in the backseat of my car, and I'm driving him to the doctor. It should be interesting.

I'm sharing this not to elicit sympathy for my brother (although your prayers are coveted!), but to demonstrate the context for the point I do want to make. I did a few things today to help him; but the thing I did that is of the most value was that I prayed. I prayed while I was waiting for the prescription...for insight from his medical team, for healing, for his peace while bed ridden...and he let me lay hands on him tonight while I prayed for his back. And boy did I pray!

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." James 5:16 (NLT)

This is one of my most cherished verses! The prayers of the righteous are both powerful and effective! I know I've written about this verse before, but it's one I draw on frequently! And I was thrilled and surprised to be reminded again of the first part of it (which I hadn't recalled from memory). This is a verse about healing! Woo hoo! I prayed tonight that God would prove Himself strong, and perform a miracle of healing that will demonstrate His love for my brother. I prayed that it would be for His glory that He would perform an act of healing, and that the testimony it wrote for my brother would be everlasting. I pray the angels will dance and rejoice at the show of God's might. And these prayers are worth more than ice packs, prescription runs and heating up a couple frozen meals. I would love to ask for you to pray for my brother (and you're all welcome to do that!), but more powerfully in my heart tonight is that you would ask for God to be glorified through this situation. I know God hears my prayer (see Jeremiah 29:12 & 13...often overshadowed by the preceding verse, but a couple of my favorites). Now it's time for Him to do what He does best, and intervene in our lives, out of love. He deserves the praise! I want to hear the angels sing! Thank You, Lord, for who You are and what You are doing right now in my brother and in my heart! I declare You are holy, majestic and a mighty Lord! Thank You!!!

Interactive God

2009-09-30T11:11:00.002-05:00

I feel like I'm getting a new lesson from the Lord about His activity and engagement in our lives. As I'm reading through the Old Testament, I am not struck as much by the "Old Testament God" people talk of - who is supposed to be harsh and unyeilding. Instead, I am struck again and again by the Lord's tender heart for His people, His mercy and His closeness and presence in their lives.

Here's a demonstration of that:

"In those days Hezekiah became ill and was at the point of death. The prophet Isaiah son of Amoz went to him and said, "This is what the LORD says: Put your house in order, because you are going to die; you will not recover."

Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the LORD, "Remember, O LORD, how I have walked before you faithfully and with wholehearted devotion and have done what is good in your eyes." And Hezekiah wept bitterly.

Before Isaiah had left the middle court, the word of the LORD came to him: "Go back and tell Hezekiah, the leader of my people, 'This is what the LORD, the God of your father David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears; I will heal you. On the third day from now you will go up to the temple of the LORD. I will add fifteen years to your life. And I will deliver you and this city from the hand of the king of Assyria. I will defend this city for my sake and for the sake of my servant David.' "" 2 Kings 20:1-6 (NIV)

I loved reading this. I have heard several really good teachings on the few example stories there are in the Bible of God's mind being changed by His people. For today's purposes, I have zero desire to broach that subject at all. My point is, regardless of the specific context of the story, the thing I am struck by in the message is that He is close at hand, present and affected by our bitter weeping. Even typing that and letting it really sink in brings tears to my own eyes...He is a present King!

I'm not sure there needs to be more explanation than just that. If you ever feel like God is distant, as if He doesn't hear you, or isn't responding to your prayers, be corrected by this scripture. Hezekiah's heart was His, and He was Hezekiah's Lord & Master. But, moreover, He was and is the "I AM" for whom there is no words; He leads, He rules, and in a way that we can neither fully understand nor articulate, He loves. And love is an action. And His love is active. Today. Right now. He is by your side. Don't doubt it. He's here.

A Specific Word

2009-09-29T11:11:00.001-05:00

While I'd love to be able to quote a concise few verses here for you today, the basis for today's writing is actually two full chapters of the Bible. So, on your own, I'll encourage you to read 2 Kings 18 & 19; it tells quite a great story!

There's some potentially important nuance to the story, but the short version (and basis for my writing today) is this: The king of Assyria, Sennacherib, comes to those guarding Jerusalem and basically says, "You're fools for depending on the Lord. He can't save you from us; we're powerful! Don't listen to Hezekiah. Come join our side!" He goes onto say that the Lord has actually instructed him (Sennacherib) to destroy Hezekiah & his people. It's a lie, but it's effective.... the people are afraid. And Hezekiah, it seems, is confused and afraid.

However, Hezekiah goes to the Lord directly in prayer, and also sends some of his staff to see the prophet Isaiah on the matter. To make a long story short, Isaiah comes back with a specific and clear word for Hezekiah, and the long and short of it is: Sennacherib is full of it, and he's messed with the wrong people. I'm gonna make him very, very sorry. The Lord even promises to defend the city Himself, saying He will save it and defend it.

Wow!

For me, this was a powerful reminder. God does get involved in our personal lives when we let Him. Needless to say (I hope!), God kills Sennacherib through his own sons and further sends death to 185,000 in the Assyrian camp. Yeah, he messed with the wrong God. As I wrote about last week, God is searching for those of us whose hearts are fully committed to Him, and He wants to prove Himself strong on our behalf!

This story relayed an important thing to my heart: God can, will and does speak specific words over specific scenarios in our lives. It's not all over-quoted platitudes about general wellness, leading and grace. Please know that I do not intend to undervalue these broader promises; they are the foundation for all of His promises and much of my own faith! At the same time, there is a different part of my heart that is encouraged to see yet another example of Him getting down and dirty in the details. Hezekiah loved the Lord, and he followed Him in earnest. An enemy (the enemy!) came to call and threaten, and when Hezekiah sought His hand, the Lord came in and whooped up on Sennacherib. End of the day, that's the story. End of the day, that's the point.

He is right here, as close as the air we breathe, and He is more than ready to get involved in the details of our lives. Invite Him in, and make room for Him to work. He may just have a specific promise for YOU!

To Show Himself Strong

2009-09-28T11:11:00.000-05:00

I'm nearly certain I've written about this specific verse before, but the Lord has brought it back into focus for me, and shown me a new way to see it...so, I'm sharing with you!

"For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth to show Himself strong in behalf of those whose hearts are blameless toward Him." 2 Chronicles 16:9a (NLT)

The portion of this verse that has newly struck a chord in my heart is in the middle: "to show Himself strong."

What does that mean? I've been meditating on and praying about that very question for a few days now. What does it mean?

What would it mean if my brother showed up to "show himself strong" on my behalf? Well, it'd mean a few things, but somehow, the immediate visual I get includes big muscles, powerful punches and protection. It might involve pushing through a crowd, grabbing my hand and pulling me through the confusion. It might mean stepping in when I'm hurting, and putting aside his own stuff to just lend a shoulder upon which to cry.

Can you see your tender Savior stepping in to do the same for you, my friend? I can... it's a lovely thing. And what's more is that the scripture says He doesn't just do this reluctantly or when we're in a jam. No, His eyes run to and fro, and He is looking for you & I. He is looking for hearts fully committed to Him, and that's it. We just have to love Him the way He told us to...with all our hearts, our souls and our minds. And He is ready, willing, able and eager to PROVE Himself strong. Give Him a chance to show off today; let Him love on you. And praise His holy name for a heart willing to be here, for me, any moment...proving His strength and mercy.

Together in Prayer

2009-09-24T11:11:00.001-05:00

Matthew 18:19-20 is a familiar passage to many of us:

"Again I say to you, if tow of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there I am among them."

I, personally, have always thought about this verse within the context of church. I've thought about tiny Bible studies and small prayer gatherings, and been grateful to know that Jesus gathered there with those praying, and that the Father listened just as intently to their prayers as those lifted up by large groups.

The picture I had in my mind about this particular verse tonight, though, was something different and new...and it gave me a rush of gratitude in a whole new way.

I thought of worried parents, huddling together in prayer waiting for a child who should have been home for curfew hours ago. I thought of siblings, kneeling together at the foot of a sick mother's bed, praying over her sickness and physical body. And I thought of a newlywed couple, bowing together at the altar, seeking God's direction as they build their new life together.

With these scenes passing through my mind, I was humbled anew at God's gracious and spacious love for us. Friends, as we gather together - in moments of fear and grief, as well as in moments of adoration, gratitude and praise, Jesus is there with us. I can just picture Him laying hands on the bowed heads of that couple, praying with us, praying with them, that the Father's hand of guidance and favor would be on their lives. The thought brings tears to my eyes.

God's ways of answering prayer are sometimes hard for me to understand, but I believe He hears and answers, in His way and in His time, each one. If you've ever doubted His tender ear's attention to your words, remember that, when you join with another in the agreement of prayer, the two or three of you are always joined by one more. Hallelujah...

Think on This...

2009-09-23T11:11:00.004-05:00

So, today, I got a little sucked into a bit of historical information, and my experience around that is the source for today's post.

I'd heard in a sermon recently that, apparently, Haitian leaders in the late 1700s had made a rather well documented pact with the devil, promising Haiti into Satan's hands for 200 years if he (and other voodoo "gods") would deliver freedom from the French.

Rather than getting into all the ins and outs of the story (and the various debates surrounding it), I will stay focused on my topic for today.

I started reading about this, and then DID get into all the details and debates and stories that intertwine contemporary Haitian history and politics with a pact made just over 200 years ago, and so on and so forth. My intention in doing this research was not only simple self-edification, but also to equip myself for prayer against the evil things plaguing the greatly-struggling Haiti of today.

However, as a creepy feeling of dis-ease began to settle over me, I realized that the graphic gore and description of the associated rituals, voodoo practices and beliefs had begun to saturate my mind as I was reading.

I had to stop.

I put away and closed down each source of information, and I turned to the best weapons I know to wield: prayer & scripture.

Most immediate in my mind was this verse, which I find to be perfectly appropriate:

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8 (NIV)

There are verses to reference and prayers to be said for Haiti as well, regardless of its history, but first and foremost, I had to secure my own head-space. It seems like the perfect "in" for a spiritual attack, if you ask me.

So, here is what I used to fill my head; it's one of my favorites. I will close with this passage; let it fill you as you read. As you'll see, I found it to be equally appropriate for both my own filling and as a promise for ALL of those who turn their hearts to the Lord, in Haiti or anywhere else!

Isaiah 61 (NIV)

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,

because the LORD has anointed me

to preach good news to the poor.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,

to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,

and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

They will rebuild the ancient ruins
and restore the places long devastated;
they will renew the ruined cities
that have been devastated for generations.

Aliens will shepherd your flocks;
foreigners will work your fields and vineyards.

And you will be called priests of the LORD,
you will be named ministers of our God.
You will feed on the wealth of nations,
and in their riches you will boast.

Instead of their shame
my people will receive a double portion,
and instead of disgrace
they will rejoice in their inheritance;
and so they will inherit a double portion in their land,
and everlasting joy will be theirs.

"For I, the LORD, love justice;
I hate robbery and iniquity.
In my faithfulness I will reward them
and make an everlasting covenant with them.

Their descendants will be known among the nations
and their offspring among the peoples.
All who see them will acknowledge
that they are a people the LORD has blessed."

I delight greatly in the LORD;
my soul rejoices in my God.
For he has clothed me with garments of salvation
and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness,
as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest,
and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

For as the soil makes the sprout come up
and a garden causes seeds to grow,
so the Sovereign LORD will make righteousness and praise
spring up before all nations.

Boldness Please

2009-09-22T11:11:00.001-05:00

I'm doing a very careful reading of Acts for a class I'm in right now, and I am learning so much and being enriched in so many ways. If you haven't, I'd encourage all to take some time to slowly dig into this amazing book of the Bible!

The story that has inspired me to day is in Acts 4. Please read it for yourself, but in lieu of that, here is a short synopsis: the leaders of the Jewish religious and legal community of the day bring Peter & John in to figure out how to challenge and condemn them after they perform a miraculous healing in the name of Jesus. They're essentially stumped for the short term, but send John & Peter away with a command to stop preaching and healing in the name of Jesus.

What happens next is truly awe-inspiring! Peter & John return to their friends and fellow believers, they retell what has happened, and the church breaks into fervent, scriptural prayer. The last recorded words of their prayer are these:

"And now, O Lord, hear their threats, and give us, your servants, great boldness in preaching your word. Stretch out your hand with healing power; may miraculous signs and wonders be done through the name of your holy servant Jesus.”" Acts 4:2 9-30 (NLT).

My prayer for today is that when I am faced with challenges and attack, the prayers of my heart will follow the same pattern as what is shared here. I ask that I would desire further boldness and that I would pursue more glory for your name, Lord...no matter what the cost!

Quick Fixes

2009-09-21T11:11:00.001-05:00

Sometimes, I can become fairly easily overwhelmed and discouraged by the ways in which God works. From an objective and reasoned place, I do absolutely trust and believe that His ways are perfect and, furthermore, in my own life, I have absolutely seen that His paths and plans work far better than my own ever could!

At the same time, I sometimes would really like a quick fix. I'd like for grief to have melted away to a balmy acceptance years later; I would prefer for healing to be a clear straight line... always improving, and never been caught off guard by the discovery of a new wounded place. I'd like it to work that way sometimes. Or at least I think I would.

I also acknowledge that, if God did always work that way (because sometimes, He does), I'd never appreciate the journey. And I'd miss all the important "scenery" along the way. A wave of God's magic "wand" might seem like an attractive option, but, in truth, I'd not know so much of what I've learned about the journey of redemption and restoration. Jesus spent years forming the single act that changed the entire universe; I suppose I ought to take a cue from that. Could He have descended and done it all in a 10 minute window? I'm sure He could have! But He didn't! I think it's reasonable to assume that the reason is that there's purpose in the journey. Purpose in the building, and sometimes, in the tearing away.

I am grateful God is God and that I am not. I am grateful that Jesus willingly, lovingly and patiently sits on the throne of my life. And I am reminding myself and all who read these words that His ways are perfect. His path may seem long, but He's mapped it the way He has for a reason, and the reason is for your good and mine. I surrender to that, and I submit to His ways. Sometimes I need a reminder, but I'm glad He is only a heartbeat away when I need them!

His Ways

2009-09-18T11:11:00.002-05:00

I came across an interesting gem of a story in the scriptures today, one I don't remember hearing before... Here's a quick summary:

Naaman comes to Elisha, the prophet in Israel, looking for a cure for his leprosy. Elisha hears that he's coming, and sends a messenger telling Naaman to wash himself seven times in the Jordan river, and that this will heal his leprosy.

Naaman, however, is upset by this action from Elisha. Scripture says, "But Naaman went away angry and said, "I thought that he would surely come out to me and stand and call on the name of the LORD his God, wave his hand over the spot and cure me of my leprosy. Are not Abana and Pharpar, the rivers of Damascus, better than any of the waters of Israel? Couldn't I wash in them and be cleansed?" So he turned and went off in a rage." 2 Kings 5:9-12 (NIV)

Thankfully, Naaman had some servants who challenged his anger, and encouraged him to take Elisha's advise. They reminded him that, if the prophet had told Naaman to do something "great," he would have done it...so why not something more simple? Naaman heeds their advice, washes in the Jordan as instructed and is healed.

It's not immediately clear to me the exact emotions behind Naaman's anger; his response seems to indicate he was offended by being bet with a messenger, rather than the prophet himself. However, he also indicates that he'd expected a lot more flourish and show.

I had to smile to myself as I read. How many times have I been able to relate to Naaman's experience here? In the many instances in which I approached God, asking for His intervention, there have also been many times during which I have nearly missed (and surely, sometimes, missed) His hand at work because I'd been expecting one thing, and He'd chosen to do another.

Isaiah 55:9 says "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." (NIV)

Yep, that sounds about right.

The end of the Naaman story in 2 Kings 5 is also important, I believe. In verse 15, after he's been healed, "...Naaman and all his attendants went back to [Elisha]. He stood before him and said, "Now I know that there is no God in all the world except in Israel. Please accept now a gift from your servant.""

Naaman clearly sees how wrong he was, and in this verse (and those following), he undertakes acts and offers of humility; he gets that he missed the mark.

There's hope in this story for me. I miss the mark all the time. Sometimes it's in ways such as this; sometimes its in other ways. The good news is that we can always turn back around, acknowledge our wrongs, seek humble amends and then keep walking forward in assurance of God's love and grace.

I learned something from Naaman today; I hope you did too!

As for me...

2009-09-17T11:11:00.001-05:00

A few words I needed to hear today...

Therefore I will praise you, O LORD, among the nations;
I will sing praises to your name. (2 Samuel 22:50)

Sing to him, sing praise to him;
tell of all his wonderful acts. (1 Chronicles 16:9)

I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness
and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High. (Psalm 7:17)

I will be glad and rejoice in you;
I will sing praise to your name, O Most High. (Psalm 9:2)

Sing praises to the LORD, enthroned in Zion;
proclaim among the nations what he has done. (Psalm 9:11)

Therefore I will praise you among the nations, O LORD;
I will sing praises to your name. (Psalm 18:49)

Be exalted, O LORD, in your strength;
we will sing and praise your might. (Psalm 21:13)

Sing to the LORD, you saints of his;
praise his holy name. (Psalm 30:4)

My lips will shout for joy
when I sing praise to you—
I, whom you have redeemed. (Psalm 71:23)

As for me, I will declare this forever;
I will sing praise to the God of Jacob. (Psalm 75:9)

Praise the LORD.
How good it is to sing praises to our God,
how pleasant and fitting to praise him! (Psalm 147:1)

He says,
"I will declare your name to my brothers;
in the presence of the congregation I will sing your praises." (Hebrews 2:12)

Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. (James 5:13)

Like me, you may notice that there seems to be some consistent direction given here. I'm choosing not to brush that off; this is a message to us all. Have you spent any time singing praise to your Father today?

Expectation

2009-09-16T11:11:00.001-05:00

I had a cool, albeit small, experience I'd like to share...

There are certain changes in myself I've been praying about, gifts I'd like to see manifest and become a real, active, daily part of my life. I was praying about this stuff the other day, and felt the nudge of the Spirit ask me what I was waiting for...

Consider this passage:

""I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." Mark 11:23-24 (NIV)

Now, I felt like the direction I was getting was the same type directly communicated in these verses. The missing element wasn't God's unwillingness to grow my heart and character, to gift me spiritually. The missing element was my belief.

I chose in that moment to expect what I was asking for, to know it was being given to me...right then, right there.

I'm telling you, friends, change was evident and immediate.

Sometimes the "mysteries of God" allow me to put the facts of His grace, His faithfulness and His constancy out of my immediate view. His word is absolute. I chose to believe Him, and He showed up, just as He said He would.

It was a lesson to me, and I'm already on the lookout for application in other areas of my life. I wonder, what things might we waiting for me that God is letting sit, waiting only on my willingness to receive wholeheartedly? What is He holding in promise for my life? What about for yours?

The Thing that Makes the Difference

2009-09-15T11:11:00.001-05:00

There are certain projects that require specific tools. I simply cannot bore a hole into a thick piece of metal without the proper drill... There are other jobs, however, that afford one more leeway. If I want to get a nail into the wall, I can use a hammer. But, I can also use the back cover of a heavy book, the heel of my shoe or any variety of other things I may have lying around. Perhaps we might all agree, however, that certain equipment will make a job easier than it would be with less well-suited tools.

So, let's extend this metaphor to life. Paul wrote to Timothy that, "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NIV)

Yes, all scripture (catch that? all...) is useful. And it is through its application that men and women may be thoroughly equipped. To me, I think there are few relevant view-points here. For starters, it is true that sometimes one can look to the wisdom of the world and find the same solution or answer one might find if searching scripture. If I have a challenging relationship at work, a kind and reasonable counselor might tell me to rely on my heart, or my feelings for guidance. And, in a feat that on some days seems truly remarkable, my feelings might actually get me to the same spot the Word would. I might decide to respond kindly to this coworker, because the conflict created otherwise isn't appealing. In the end, maybe I come to the same conclusion.

However, I need only quickly review my own history to find convincing evidence that my feelings and instincts, however well-meaning, are often misguided and unreliable. I have done what "felt" right or "seemed" smart in the eyes of the world many, many times only to have it end poorly. Yet, when I have searched scripture & let the Holy Spirit lead my actions, I have never (really, never!) regretted it.

I think about all the complexities of life, the pain of life's seasons and trials, many of which are completely beyond our control. And I wonder how the "me" of a former life (before Jesus) would have responded to the things I see in my world today; in truth, I can only guess and it doesn't really matter. What does matter is that I know His guidance and the leading of His word and Spirit are the turning point, each and every time. He will lead me, and that is good every time!

Announcement: Publishing Schedule

2009-09-12T22:42:00.001-05:00

Just a quick FYI - we'll be publishing on weekdays only from here on out! :) See you Monday!

Friendship

2009-09-11T11:11:00.001-05:00

I had an experience today that provoked me to stop and remember just how valuable our friendships are. I absolutely believe that our God, a God of relationship, must have put special love into His design for Godly friendship.

From His word:

If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up!

Ecclesiastes 4:10 (NIV)

A friend of mine had a scary incident today, and reached out for some support. I was so honored and glad to be available in her moment of worry and fear. The situation resolved well, but did leave me thinking. Where would I be without the friends in my life today and in years passed that have meant so much to me? I am grateful to say that there have been few times in my memory during which I was one of those who had no one to help me up. The Lord has been faithful in providing me always with a friend to help me when I fall.

As has been my experience of God's principles and precepts, being a part of them in any role is always beneficial. In this context, that means that it's good to be not only the one receiving help from a friend, but also the friend helping another. I find that both are gratifying, and on any given day, I am certain God smiles down on us as we live out His love for the people in our lives.

For me, it's an encouragement to remember that part of His designs includes being there for our friends. On some days, I feel like this is some of the most important ministry work I undertake. So, as we go into our weekends, let's all remember how much being a real friend can me - and maybe even take time to thank someone who's been that friend we needed in that challenging moment or season. It gets talked about a lot, but I'm hoping to overcome the cynical feeling of "Oh yeah, that's trite" and instead put enough time, heart and energy into really appreciating and valuing my friends today. I trust it will bless not only them, but me as well! God's plans work like that; it's a wonderful thing!

Vantage Point

2009-09-10T11:11:00.001-05:00

"Hear, O LORD, and be merciful to me; O LORD, be my help. You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give you thanks forever." Psalm 30:10-12

Each and every one of us has bad days. Yesterday, one of the computer systems over which I have purview crashed, I hadn't gotten enough sleep, my head ached all day and I was cold. All I wanted to do was to go home and sleep, and yet, even after I was off work, I had commitments I needed to fulfill - and they ended up going longer than anticipated. I got home late, tired and stressed.

Yet, even in the midst of what really amounts to nothing more than a "bummer" day, I am utterly convinced of the reasons for gratitude and joy, and not just it spite of the bad day. This verse (and the many, many other like it - praise God!) remind me of the necessity of looking at life with His eyes and from the vantage point of His kingdom and the big picture.

I look at my life before I decided to let Jesus have His way with my heart, and I can't deny that, yes, there was wailing. There was the modern day equivalent of sackcloth and oh-so-much grief, sadness and mourning. My heart felt nearly dead for many years.

Do I still have occasion for grief, sadness and mourning in my life? Yes, of course. But when I look at the scope of my entire life, and the landscape of my heart as a whole, I have joy. I dance and I sing. It is these facts of which I hope to never lose sight. And I have found that when I keep my eyes pointed toward Him, no cruddy morning can take them from my sights. And I'm oh-so-grateful!

Amazing Faith

2009-09-09T11:11:00.001-05:00

The seventh chapter of Luke opens with a story that is among my favorites in the gospels, and a source of much recent inspiration for me.

I encourage you to read the story for yourself, but the short version is that a man comes to Jesus, asking Him to come heal one of his valued servants. Before they get all the way to the man's house, however, the man balks and tells Jesus that he (the man) isn't worthy of Jesus' presence in his home.

The man goes on to say to Jesus, "I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed. For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and that one, 'Come,' and he comes. I say to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it."" Luke 7:7b-8 (NIV), emphasis mine

Now, here's the good part: "When Jesus heard this, he was amazed at him, and turning to the crowd following him, he said, "I tell you, I have not found such great faith even in Israel."" Luke 7:9 (NIV)

I don't know about you, but I definitely want to take a lesson from the man whose faith amazed Jesus. Hello! Amazing to JESUS?!? Um, yes please!

So, I started taking a look at my own faith and the times, places and situations in which it shows up outwardly & inwardly. And I started looking at this situation. What's similar about the ways in which I sometimes believe? What's different?

Here's what I realized.

God has been pushing me and teaching me a lot over the last year about believing Him for His promises to me - promises found both in the Bible, and also those specific ones He's made to my heart through the Holy Spirit. And I have gratefully come a long way. In the instance of this story, however, the man approaches the Lord without any pre-existing promise specifically related to the topic of his ailing servant. If anything, he may come with the foundation of promises that tell us that our prayers are heard, and that God will respond to us. So, at least so far, that is part of what I've realized makes the faith of this man so amazing.

He comes with a new boldness. Although I do not mean to diminish my own journey in believing, I must admit that things for which I've been learning to believe Him haven't been particularly remarkable. So far (and it IS a journey I've only just begun in so many ways!), I've come into a place of learning to believe Him for the things He's said. Truthfully, this isn't all that remarkable. If my friend says, "I'll meet you at 3:30," I expect to see her at 3:30. When my co-worker says, "I will bring that in to lend to you," I am not surprised when she brings it in to share with me. This is the kind of belief I, personally, have had to work on with God. In essence, His word has said, "I've got this thing I'm going to do" and "Here are the things I'm going to take care of" and I've had to get to the place of simply believing He'd do the things He says He will do - specifically.

So, my suspicion for the next lesson for me is that God's ready to work on getting me to believe Him for my requests, whether He's explicitly affirmed them or not. Now, don't get me wrong; I am certain that there are some parameters that are in play here. I know there is abundant commentary on such things, and I'm sure I'll delve into some of that in my own study at some point, but for today, I'm just looking at the path ahead and taking in the view.

So, for now, I'm just realizing that God's plans for me include not only the faith I've built with Him so far (and it's amazing to me!), but also so much more. He is good, and I am SO grateful that His view is wider and greater and far above my own! So, here's to the next leg of the journey! I can't wait!

Wilderness with Purpose

2009-09-05T11:11:00.001-05:00

"And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness, that he might humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments or not." Deuteronomy 8:2 (ESV)

I think we all go through various times one might consider a wilderness. Not to over extend an often-over-extended metaphor, but I think these wildernesses can be entire chapters in our lives, or, sometimes, just a part of a week. I know I've had even parts of a single day that felt a wilderness like for me.

What I love about the verse about (which may seem like an odd verse to "love") is the reminder of the purpose in it. Even the Israelites who wandered in the literal desert for forty years (talk about a season!) were brought to that place for a reason. Perhaps it was their own rebellion as a people that brought them to the place in which they needed saving, but truly, even then, God redeemed the time. He used it to test them, to refine them. I know that, at least for me, the idea of being tested by God isn't immediately met with a big "yay!," but in truth, I do want God's testing to come, because 1) it's the way I learn and grow and 2) it's His will working and whittling away at the dross in my life.

So, for today, especially in my few-hour "wildernesses," I am going to be grateful for a God who uses the uncomfortable predicaments into which I may lead myself. I am grateful for a to a God who takes what seems like it could have been counted as loss and restores it with intention. When I remember that it is into His hands that I must commit my journey, crossing the deserts of my life becomes much easier. Thank God for that!

Where the Spirit of the Lord is...

2009-09-04T11:11:00.001-05:00

Second Corinthians 3:17 says, "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom."

Talk about a promise. I can rely on that word: where His Spirit is (which, really, just means where I invite in the Spirit & make room for His presence), I can count on freedom.

I think there's another possible application for this verse as well. When I consider the lives of those around me and my relationships, I can give them the gift of freedom more easily when I let th Spirit run the show. I know that, for me personally, I sometimes want to try to control others in my life. I want them to do what I want, prioritize the way I do, or respond in a certain way to the things I say and do. Yet, there isn't love in those desires; it's control. While one of the characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit is love (Galatians 5:32), I think this extends into this idea of freedom quite well. I can release my loved ones into being who they are, fully and freely, when I remember that my root is in Him. When His Spirit guides my day, I am able to better embrace others - just as they are, and also to stand steady myself, regardless of how others receive me.

I think that's the essence of true freedom on this earth in many ways. And I am not only grateful for the option to live into it, but also thankful for the reminder that, on tough days, the path from "here" to that place of freedom is all about letting His Spirit guide the way. God is good; I just have to let Him do what He does best.

Promises Kept

2009-09-03T11:11:00.002-05:00

I came across a verse I had as a "favorite" a while ago... I'd sort of forgotten about it. While part of me has a moment of "oh no, don't forget these verses!," I am more amazed by the realization that there are so many verses like this in the Bible, I can forget some of the individual instances.

The verse:

"God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?" Numbers 23:19 (NIV)

The main point, as I read it, is "Hey, this is GOD we're talking about here. He's not going to bail on you, change His mind or flake out on ya. He promises and He delivers. Every time."

And I don't know about you, but I need reminders fo that fact again and again and again. Somehow, I manage to almost forget that so often! I call it the "pea brain syndrome." My little human "pea brain" simply cannot grasp the enormity of the concept of a truly faithful God, without fail, without wavering. His steadfastness is truly beyond my reach in so many ways.

In any case, He is who He says He is. And He DOES do what He says He'll do. Every time.

He's not like you & me. (Thankfully!)

So, I am reminding myself today that the promises He makes are kept... this includes the promises in scripture, but it also includes the tested & tried words He's spoken directly to me. The Bible reminds us that we're to test all things and retain the good, but once we have clear confirmation, we can count on God, 100%. No ifs, no buts... just YES. Yes yes yes. He is faithful - beyond my pea brained imagination, and I am SO grateful!

Baggage at the Cross

2009-09-01T11:11:00.001-05:00

I had this mental image yesterday that I want to share with you all. It came to me while I was thinking in the context of new believers, so let's start there.

The image is a simple one... it's people burdened and weary walking up to the cross and unloading the luggage they've been carrying... some have heavy backpacks and are dragging along a suitcase or two behind them. Some have heavy, old trunks, clearly packed full that are strapped to their back; they can barely stand under the weight.

Each walks timidly at first up to the cross and sets his or her load down at the ground. For some of them, it's clearly painful and difficult just to take it off their backs; it's probably been there a long time. There are so many things they've been holding onto. They finally have somewhere to lay it all down.

Once they're finished shedding their excess burdens, there is an amazing transformation. Some leap and jump with joy. Some fall to their knees, weeping in gratitude. And some, (I think I would have been one of these) simply stand there, a little stunned and unsure of what to do, but light is around them and their countenance has changed. They are at the beginning of a special journey.

The reason this image stood out so much to me was 1) I think I need reminding, often, that this is what I'm invited to do and what I have done (once and for all!) at the cross. I can run back up there, pick up my load and trudge around for awhile if I really want to... but I DID lay those things down a long time ago. And 2) I find new things. The jacket I thought was keeping me warm turns out to be full of pockets, each one stuffed with old garbage. When I find these things, I can stick them back in my pocket and continue to wander, or I can turn back toward the cross (It is always right next to me) and put them down, leaving them for Jesus to tend forever.

Remember that you, too, have a choice. Each and every day. Each and every burden. We do not have to carry them alone. In fact, we don't have to carry them at all!

On the Move

2009-08-31T11:11:00.000-05:00

So, I wrote yesterday about something I believe is a specific word for those of us reading (and writing!) this blog:

"The Spirit is on the move."

I pray that you heard Him speak to you in that word. I believe His word was coming your way.

For me, this is, in part, a word about believing. And, in part, a word about surrender to His timing.

More than anything else, in the last 24 hours, it's proven to be exciting encouragement from the Lord! I have two situations for myself, personally, to which I think this is meant to be applied for me, and what I am remembering mostly is the sovereignty and supreme love of God. His Spirit is at work, active. So, why would I worry? Why would I fret? Why would I try to work so hard on making something happen or not happen or happen in a certain way? The SPIRIT is on the move!

For me, as it turns out, this is about letting go. So I'm letting go. Join me?

Something to Say

2009-08-30T11:11:00.002-05:00

Sitting in worship today, I got the inspiration I'd been praying for today. Some days are easier than others when it comes to finding topics for my writing here; I don't want this to be a place where I write about the things I think are worth addressing. I want to write about His topics. Lately, it's felt a little dry for me; so, I've been praying.

And today, we have a topic given, I believe, by God. I'm tempted to put this out there, just as He spoke it, and then let it be complete in that. I don't think that's what's intended, but it may be enough in and of itself to compromise a complete message on its own.

So, is that enough build up for you? Okay, here it is:

The Spirit is on the move.

I'm going to keep my commentary on this topic short for today, and pick it up again tomorrow... but until then, I want to just encourage you to let that sink in.

The Spirit is on the move.

In you. In your life. In the hearts of those you love. He is doing something.

And I don't mean all this in generic "God's always doing something" kind of way. I believe whole-heartedly that this is a word for someone who is reading this. I think it was for me, and I hope it is for you too. Isn't it great that God isn't limited and can speak to ALL of us at the same time? All with 6 simple words. But, please, stop. Listen. Close your eyes and open your heart. He is talking to you.

The Spirit is on the move.

Praise God. Right? I mean it. The Spirit is active and working in that place, in that situation. You know which one He means. You know. He knows. He's here. He's watching. And not from the sidelines. Keep stepping out of the way, and know that HE (the Almighty Maker of creation!) is working. The Spirit is on the move.

Receive it, please. He's speaking to YOU.

Who He Is

2009-08-29T11:11:00.002-05:00

The Lord is...

...my strength and my song

...my Banner

...greater than all other gods

...with us

...slow to anger, abounding in love and forgiving sin and rebellion

...GOD

...is their inheritance, as He promised them

...your life

...powerful

...is a God who knows

...my rock, my fortress and my deliverer

...just

...your strength

...a refuge for the oppressed

And that's just a handful from the wealth of the TRUTH.

Exodus 15:2, Exodus 17:15, Exodus 18:11, Numbers 14:9, Numbers 14:18, Deuteronomy 4:35, Deuteronomy 18:2, Deuteronomy 30:20, Joshua 4:24, 1 Samuel 2:3, 2 Samuel 22:2, 2 Chronicles 12:6, Nehemiah 8:10, Psalm 9:9...for starters!

What a great God we serve!!!

Faithful

2009-08-28T11:11:00.000-05:00

As usual, I have been meditating a lot on the idea of faith lately. Regular readers may recall seeing multiple references to Hebrews 11:1 lately ("Faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of things not yet seen" (NIV).

I've found that, at least for me, my own ability to live in faith is directly related to how truly I believe in God's faithfulness - as a fixed, permanent and constant attribute of His character. In church, in study and in songs, I hear a lot about God's faithfulness. And, with praise, I am glad to report that I have seen it in my own life - again and again and again.

I came across this verse today:

"Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands." Deuteronomy 7:9 (NIV)

There is a space inside me that wants (and needs) read that again and again. Not only does this verse speak in absolute truth, as authoritative Word that God is faithful, but it also gives an easy to miss command at the beginning. We are to know that the Lord is God. He is God. I don't know about you, but sometimes, I have to remind myself of just that fact: He is God (and I'm not!). He is faithful. He is keeping (present tense!) His covenant of love.

Thank You, Lord, for being who You are! Because You first loved me, I can love...and because You are faithful, I can put my enduring faith and trust in Your hands. I love You, Lord! Thank You!

Inheriting the Land

2009-08-26T11:11:00.001-05:00

When a poet writes, s/he most certainly considers which ideas and phrases come in conjunction with each other. Sentence B follows sentence A for a reason....

With that in mind, I was looking at Psalm 37:7-9:

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;

do not fret when men succeed in their ways,

when they carry out their wicked schemes.

Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret—it leads only to evil.

For evil men will be cut off,
but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land."

I admit that when I first read this, the first stanza here seemed unrelated to the next two. Naturally, refraining from anger is a good idea, whether it has anything to do with being still before God. Likewise, waiting for Him is a good move, regardless of whether or not evil men will be cut off. But, I feel fairly certain that, like any good poetry, these ideas were not put together haphazardly. So, I started considering more deeply.

It's possible that the inference here is sort of a chain of events. First message: don't be impatient with God. Well, I know that when I am impatient with His plans, I often tend to fret and worry. But then the next thing we're told here is not to fret. "It only leads to evil."

Yikes. Evil?

Looking at the Hebrew behind this word is helpful. The first note in my study aid is that the literal translation behind this word is a breaking to pieces. More properly, this word means "to spoil." So, worrying leads to me becoming spoiled. Ah, that sounds about right. The word implies displeasure and harming oneself as well. Yeah, so worry? Not good. Got it.

We're also encouraged to refrain from anger & turn from wrath. I like the KJV translation on this bit; it says to "forsake wrath." In my mind, that implies making an active decision to leave wrath out in the cold. There's choice involved.

So, where am I at with my passage then? I'm to be still and patiently let God's timing be what it is. I'm not to worry about it, and part of that means I need to choose to forgo my self-indulgent desire to be angry with Him; I get to choose to let that go.

Lastly, after a reminder that my worrying about God's timing only ruins me, I'm given a word of encouragement: "Those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land."

The KJV uses even stronger language: "those that wait upon the Lord, they shall inherit the earth." From what I can tell (and please know I'm not establishing theology here; I'm not Hebrew scholar...just trying to piece this together), this is basically an idiomatic phrase meaning "everything." Its first occurrence in the Bible is in Genesis 1:1. "In the beginning, God created the heaves and the earth." There are other examples to demonstrate, but essentially, I think a fair take-away is that those who hope in Him, get it all!

No, not literally, of course, but think about what the message is here: We put our trust, our expectant belief and hope in Him, and we get the keys to the kingdom. Hallelujah! I don't know about you, but whatever kingdom He has set aside for me, I definitely want to make sure I inherit it according to His plan!

So, for me, today, I'll be praying for the Spirit to run the show, so I can walk in patience and trust in my God. And I will do so in obedience, and in expectant faith that the land He has set aside as my promised land is going to suit me just fine. :)

Not a Word

2009-08-25T11:11:00.001-05:00

There's a verse that came my way, by God's grace, that I just had to share with you all:

“Not a word failed of any good thing which the LORD had spoken to the house of Israel. All came to pass.” Joshua 21:45

There are SO many wonderful absolute words in that verse. "Not a word." I just love to meditate on that thought...of all the good things the Lord had spoken to His people, not a word failed. None failed. His word? His promises? Not a single failure. Absolute faithfulness, absolute follow through, absolute completion of His intent. Not a word.

"so is my word that goes out from my mouth:

It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire

and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:11 (NIV)

Ah, I love it! You too? He speaks to us - in written Scripture, through movements of the Spirit, and in a multitude of other ways. Our God has a direct and clear line to our very souls. And when He speaks, it is done. Consider His language here: It will not (return void). It will accomplish. And it will achieve His purposes. These aren't wishy-washy statements. They are the very word of God. His word swirled life into existence and the world into being. His breath brought us our vitality and life.

And here, in the the Isaiah verse, we are reminded of how it works, just in general. He says so, and it happens. But, as further testimony, we're given the evidence in Joshua: Not a word. And, just as beautiful, "All came to pass." All. All. All.

I don't know about you, but I definitely need to let that word sink in.

The way we talk, in general, is in huge sweeping generalizations. It's part of our culture. "Everybody thought it was great" or "All the stores were so busy" or "I never say that" or "She always is smiling." We use absolute language so frivolously. But this isn't a random person living in 2009; this is the Lord of All, and you can bet that His words are carefully chosen and drop more weight in their very speaking than either you or I could ever possess in all of our person. The Word says more in these simple phrases "All came to pass" and "Not a word failed" than I could ever hope to say in my lifetime...and believe me, I'm a talker!

All came to pass. Not a word failed. His word will not return empty. Count on these things, believe them! Let them dwell in your richly! This is TRUTH friends! Truth!!! Hallelujah!

Asked & Answered

2009-08-24T11:11:00.001-05:00

I have to remember that in multiple instances, the Bible tells us that all we really need to do is to ask, and then to receive. I find that I am better (a lot better sometimes) at the asking than I am at the receiving... and I do believe that they're two distinct actions, both requiring a measure of willingness and intent.

I can ask and ask, but if I never stop and receive the good that the word tells is already being done on our behalf, I will just keep asking. Truth be told, I do that a lot.

So, today, I'm focusing on receiving His promises, and in the act of reception, thanking Him for using them and using me to bring Glory to Him. I know He has an infinite number of ways in which He can and does use a willing heart, but I am prone to thinking that receiving His gifts and His presence is a precursor to many of them

Keep me focused today, Lord. And help me remember to receive and give thanks!

His Way

2009-08-23T11:11:00.001-05:00

When we hurt, He comforts us.

When we are weary, He lifts us up and is our strength.

When we are lost, He guides our feet. In Him, with Him, we are found.

These are the promises of God...or at least a few of them. What He doesn't promise is to make all the uncomfortable feelings of hurting disappear. He doesn't say that we will never feel tired; just that, when we are tired, He will renew us if we lean on Him. He will guide our paths, yes, but He doesn't promise to provide a map with all the previews.

I know that when I ask God to help me surrender, He is there. He hears me. He helps. He begins helping before I even know I need to ask, and He is faithful to provide. What He might not always do is immediately dissolve any of my own willful nature. He may not wipe away every vestige of my awareness of my way. And, really, this makes sense. How could I choose to come along His way if I was unaware of a way of my own design?

He loves us enough to not to get in the way of the process He created for us...or maybe it's the process for which we were created. Either way, He is here in our lesser moments...but He doesn't necessary rocket us out of them. Like that "Footprints" poem? He carries the poem's subject, but they're still trudging along that long beach, right? Sometimes, I think that turning to Him means I am to be whisked away from the beach - it's sandy grime merely a vague memory. But that's not His way. And that's the key in all of this, isn't it? I think that's really what it's all about.

So, here I am, Lord. Impatient, willful, of this world in so many ways... and I need You. I need You, and I am desperately aware of my need, of my lack, of my incompleteness on my own. So, here I am. I choose You. And I will walk the path, even though I want desperately to avoid it altogether some days. Your way, Your will. I'm coming Your way, Lord. Thanks for being here beside me, not only comforting me with Your companionship and love, but leading me, and lifting me up when I tire. I couldn't do it any other way, and yet this is the thing for which I was created. So, here I am. I'm coming Your way.

Familiar

2009-08-21T11:11:00.000-05:00

I was talking with a group of friends last night about the unexpected repetitive patterns we sometimes recognize in our own lives. I know I'm not the only one who, at times, has realized, with a start, that a certain relationship or interaction or habit is amazingly similar to another I've had in the past. Sometimes these parallels are refreshing and comforting; I do have some good patterns I repeat sometimes.

On other occasions, this realization can come with disappointment. I've repeated patterns in relationships, in prayer & study habits, in the way I approach co-workers... you name it! And some of these, I've seen, can be not-so-good things to repeat.

The good news is that God gives us these insights into our behaviors and patterns if we look for them, and stay open to His word to us:

"For the LORD gives wisdom, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." Proverbs 2:6 (NIV)

Additionally (and very importantly!), He will give us a new way to live when the patterns aren't positive ones.

"This is what the LORD says— your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: "I am the LORD your God, whoteaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go." Isaiah 48:17 (NIV)

This post today is for anyone who, in any area of his or her life, has that "I've been here before" feeling. We've all "been there" before; it's just that, sometimes, the "there" is different from person to person. The good news is that God is a God of Good News! And He's about re-birth and redemption and restoration and transformation. He will give us wisdom; we need only ask & receive. He will teach us what is best for us and direct our feet; we need only ask...and receive.

I'm grateful for a God who leads today; and I am GLAD I'll be seeing that truth again and again!

Patience & a Quick Temper

2009-08-20T11:11:00.002-05:00

"A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel." Proverbs 15:18

I think this Proverb is one that has fairly intuitive immediate application within our lives. Today, however, in my reading, I had a new thought about it that I'd like to share....

I suppose I may be the only one (although I suspect I'm not!), but sometimes I can try to have a little quarrel with the Lord. And, you know, as I started to think about it, many of my "quarrels" with God are about timing. My "hot-temper" and my impatience can (and sometimes do) have a multitude of impacts on my relationships with others in this world. Sometimes, they have big impacts on my relationship with myself. What I think I have previously failed to recognize is that they often, also, have an impact on my relationship with God.

You know, no matter what, I do pretty much always know and actively desire a "good" relationship with God. I have learned the hard way (and the easy way, thank You!) that being in good relationship with Him is well worth my time and effort. So, on top of all the mess I can create in my earthly life with impatience and a quick reaction, I must also remember that I can create my own wedge between my heart and God's. And, of course, I'm the one who suffers there too.

This may not be excessively profound, but it certainly seems worth considering to me!

Lord, help me see and recognize my impatience and hot-temper with You! Help give me patience beyond my own strength, and teach me to come to You and Your plan for my life with meekness and humility! Thank You for Your ways! They are well above my own!

Good Sound Advice

2009-08-19T11:11:00.001-05:00

I'm going to try something a little different today...

Let's start with this passage:

"⁵Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. ¹⁷And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:15-17 (NIV)

As I read this and pondered over it, I noticed some very simple and clear directions that are given. Here is a basic summary of some of the main points, in order:

Let Christ rule in your hearts.

Be thankful.

Let the Word dwell in you as you teach and sing, with gratitude in your hearts.

Do all in the name of Jesus, giving thanks.

See any themes there? Colossians 3:16 happens to be a personal favorite of mine. I love to let my imagination come up with pictures for what it would look like to let the Word dwell in me richly. But what I've never noticed about this passage is its emphasis on gratitude!

We're told quite directly to be thankful. And the assumption is that as we teach as sing, we're doing it with gratitude in our hearts. (Well, it's either an assumption or a subtle hint!) And lastly, as we do all things in His name, we're told to do so while giving thanks.

I suspect it's no accident that these words are so repetitive in theme. Gratitude is important!

Perhaps you had your own images fill your mind as you thought of the Word dwelling richly in you. What changes in your picture if you imagine that rich indwelling and couple it with abundant and active gratitude? Mine is a beautiful thought-picture!

Let me strive for that today, Lord! You are worthy to be praised!

Trusting Enough for Thank You

2009-08-18T11:11:00.001-05:00

I told someone the other day that I was "thankful for the plan." My friend's response? "Um, what IS the plan?" My answer was, "I don't know, but I trust Him enough to be grateful for it."

You know, when I spontaneously find myself in that place of gratitude, my heart is filled just to know and see His work in my life.

Most days, I feel totally uncertain as to what His plans are for five minutes beyond the present. There are so many things He does and so many moments in which I find myself that prompt me to think, "Um, okay... I am winging it here, but hopefully I'm doing alright!" And I say that to demonstrate that, even when I am in the middle of the unfolding plan itself, sometimes I still don't know what's going on! ha!

But I also know that, really, my clarity on exactly the progression of His world isn't usually that important. What is important is that I am quick to obey, and that I stay in a place of gratitude. See, in that way, my gratitude doesn't need to be dependent upon the outcome of any specific thing or situation. It's dependent upon Him. And if I trust Him and truly believe Him and trust that His plans really are not to harm me, but to give me hope and a future (see Jeremiah 29:11!), then I have no alternative but to be grateful. For He is good, and if His plan for me is one that He deems good, then I should be doing cartwheels!

So, even in the midst of bleak times, in the middle of a harrowing season and in the darkness of the unknown, I strive to always give thanks! Because my thankfulness is not about the times, the season or the outcomes; it's about God and who He is! In Him, we can all take refuge and find gladness...of this, I am sure!

Love is an Action

2009-08-17T11:11:00.003-05:00

There's a phrase I've said again and again; I think it is true on a multitude of levels: Love is an action. At different times, and in different scenarios, this has meant different things to me. Sometimes it's mustering up the energy at the end of a long and tiring day to get up and do that one last favor for a loved one. Maybe it means stepping through my own insecurities and self-consciousness to be bold for the benefit of someone in need. Sometimes it's just as simple as doing instead of feeling.

What has recently struck me is the powerful ideas that come to mind when I consider this idea of love being an action in light of God's enormous love for me. He loves us more than we can begin to understand. The enormity of His adoration is beyond that of which we can even conceive! So, what does this mean when it comes to His love being an action.

Well, it helps me understand, in some small way how and why He chose to send His Son. It humbles and overwhelms my heart to think about the loving act of Jesus' death. He didn't just tell us He loved us. He didn't just hope we could make it "okay" through eternity. He stepped in, and He intervened. He put His feet to this dirty earth and not only died for us, but lived for us as well.

And while the act of Salvation is enough to blow my mind, it's moving in a different way for me to realize that His love for me is still alive and active in my life today. He didn't undertake one grand action 2,000 years ago and leave me to my own defenses. God shows up. Jesus restores & heals. Still. Today. In me and in you. These are the actions of love.

I think about the idea of gratitude. It's such a powerful place to focus...all I have to start doing is thinking of my gratitude list as a list of actions God has undertaken on my behalf, motivated by His active and real love for me. Wow. I begin to be overwhelmed by His love again. And it's a wonderful feeling.

I encourage you to put some intention into looking for His active love in your life - it's ALL around us. And, just like in any other relationship, when I focus on the things He does for me out of love, I am drawn closer to His heart and feel more tender to His holy touch. How could that not be worth the tiny bit of energy it takes to pause & notice?

Refuge

2009-08-15T11:11:00.001-05:00

I was feeling sad last night. It wasn't anything "big," but just missing someone and feeling sad. I had some good time with God in the midst of my sadness, and He reminded me of an important fact. Loving God, keeping my eyes focused on Him and finding joy in Him do not exclude me having my feelings. God created those too.

So, rather than beat up on myself and tell myself that if I were really seeking God, I wouldn't ever be sad (what a lie from the enemy that is!), I was reminded that I can feel my feelings AND still leave the reigns in God's hands.

So, as I was feeling sad and praying, I asked Him to just comfort me. And I felt like His encouragement was simply to take refuge in Him. I imagine a craggy cliff, and finding a little nook of His warmth in which to tuck myself away. I snuggled into that nook, and just felt His presence. I still felt sad for a little while, but it was just sadness...not a depth of sorrow, not soul crushing ache. Just sad. And that was okay.

I am so grateful that we have a God who not only allows us to feel, but will sit with us while we do. I celebrate that in Him today!

"You Complete Me"

2009-08-13T11:11:00.001-05:00

"'As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.'" John 15:9-11 (NIV)

It's so easy, even for me, to start thinking that sometimes God just wants to rain on my parade. Some days, it can feel like a lot of "rules." More frequently, though, I hear this from non-believers and the culture. Likewise, I hear comments all the time - on TV, in magazines and from friends of mine about how "impossible" it is to find fulfillment. So many seem to think that happiness, let alone complete joy, is an unattainable reality!

Yet, the word tells us differently on both counts. Isn't it ironic that the very guidelines our Maker gives, that often get such a bad wrap, are the very things that will lead us down the path for which so many search? The question that comes to mind immediately for me is how can I share that? I've learned the truth of Jesus' claims here in the truth and experience of my own life. I've seen it in the journeys those around me take. I know God's sovereign faithfulness. So, I know. But so many do not!

The best way, I think, is to live it out. I try to live my life in a way that demonstrates the difference. There's a time-honored principle that states, "If you want what I have, you have to do what I've done." In my opinion, it is a far more effective tack to just live the life I love and trust Him to catch the hearts & interest of others. I don't mean to say that intentional witnessing isn't good, but the people I live around need ministry as much as the next person. So, my thought is, live what IS my life...and my life is showered in bounty on many sides by a loving and generous Fathers. Then other people can simply take note of what I have...then they start to get curious about what I did to get to where I am.

The opposite approach - starting with what "what I did" means focusing on obedience, surrender and submission. For some situations, and in some relationships, this is the right on approach too. It depends.

The beauty of it all is that, regardless of which approach unfolds, what the Bible says here is clear and true. He gives us guidelines - that "owner's manual" so many people complain doesn't exist - and they are directions given for our own good and joy...complete joy! Who wouldn't want to pursue that with everything in them? Count me in!

For Freedom, Set Free

2009-08-12T11:11:00.001-05:00

Galatians 5:1 is one of my all-time favorite verses in the Bible. It has had new meaning and importance to me in a variety of seasons and scenarios so far in life, and I am sure there is only more to come. I would like to do a quick look at this verse today.

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." (NIV)

In context, Paul is writing to the church at Galatia and encouraging them to resist the temptation to continue to feel conscripted by the old traditional Jewish law. Not to oversimplify, but I think that the essence of what he's saying here is plainly spoken in the verse.

It is easy to fall into old patterns - old habits, old attitudes, old idols, old withholding, old fear. You name it. But this verse reminds us that we can fall back into those old strongholds and that, when we do, it's a burden akin to the yoke of slavery.

And Christ, my friends...He has set us free. Free. No less. Completely free.

So, stand firm. Fight the temptation to get lazy; resist the devil's whisper that just a little bit of this or that in your heart won't hurt. Stand firm. And be free.

Knowing What's Right

2009-08-11T11:11:00.001-05:00

"'For you will be expelled from the synagogues, and the time is coming when those who kill you will think they are doing a holy service for God. This is because they have never known the Father or me. Yes, I’m telling you these things now, so that when they happen, you will remember my warning.'" John 16:2-4a (NLT)

Jesus' words here really jumped out at me today. "The time is coming when those who kill you will think they are doing a holy service for God." Wow. I noticed that it doesn't say "for their gods" or "for humanity." Others who persecute the followers of Jesus will think they are doing a holy thing for God. Our God. The only God.

I wish wish wish there was a simple and complete list of things to do and not do that covered life completely. Yes, there is the Bible, and its rich guidance covers life on a macro scale. But, there is no listing that clarifies exactly which words I'm supposed to use when comforting a grieving friend or how to respond to an employee who is curious about my church, but cautiously so. There are a million different specific scenarios that are covered within the general wisdom of the Bible, but about which specific direction is not given. I wish there was.

Along those same lines, I pray about all my major decisions, and as many minor ones as I remember to. The exact words for a friend, the scriptural passage I need in a moment of hurting or the name of a family member who needs an extra hand can all come to me as if from no where in ways and times that I know are from the Lord. The Spirit speaks to my gut with words unspoken and messages I could never articulate. Yet, I could pray hours and hours and, still, some answers would not be provided. There is no list of absolutes - not even in prayer.

I can seek wise counsel; I can meditate, read the wisdom of the scholars, listen to countless sermons, seek God's direction in prayer and read the Bible cover-to-cover, and EVEN then, there are still some things where the exact answer I think I need may not come.

I personally believe this is because we're also given minds and hearts of our own. We're taught so that we can learn, and then, in turn, apply what we've learned. Sometimes we do it wrong, but sometimes we do it right. I don't need to ask God whether I should have Chex or Rice Krispies for breakfast; truth is, He may not care. But, when it comes to more important decisions, I can seek His will and wisdom tirelessly. And yet, in many decisions, there will come a time when it's time to decide. And then what? As the passage above says, there will be those who persecute Jesus' true followers and think they are doing so in the defense of God! How can I avoid being one so misled?

Well, I think it's a combination of all of the above, and perhaps above all, a willingness to be corrected. A humble heart keeps me open to learning that I am wrong and willing to, in turn, set things right. I can walk forward in boldness knowing that if I honestly seek Him, He will never leave me stranded. His faithfulness extends beyond that which I can comprehend.

Just a few verses down, Jesus adds this: "'But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it known to you.'" John 16:13-14 (NIV)

So take heart! The Spirit of truth comes, and we are guided by His grace! So, make sure you're resting in Him, and then you can rest easy!